Final Fire

[svk]

I've referenced it in the scrounging thread but I'll just give a quick recap.

My mom has developed very severe mental illness and as of last spring could no longer stay in her home. My aunt (her sister, who is unwilling to accept how bad her condition really is despite my attempts to get her additional help) moved her to a senior apartment which failed miserably and she ended up in assisted living. We finally convinced her to sell the house and it closes around the end of this month. I now live a couple hours away but with the help of my inlaws have been here getting my stuff as well out as well as going through papers etc so we can close. Luckily the buyers are taking it as is so it doesn't need to be completely cleaned out. But I'm still going through the place drawer by drawer and have found some wonderful treasures of low monetary but high intrinsic value such as my grandpa's cousin's Purple Heart and letters from my grandparents, etc.

The house is an old Victorian style home with lots of beautiful woodwork, crown moldings, and so on. The outside is getting long in the tooth but inside is like a church especially since my mom redid almost the entire inside after my dad died before she became very reclusive.

Anyhow. Enough of that stuff. This will probably be the last night I'll ever spend here (I lived here my entire life up to age 18) so I lit up the old fireplace for one final fire. We had lots of good times here while my dad was alive in this living room with grandparents, other relatives, and friends.



The wood room in the basement (complete with coal door to load from outside). This wood was probably put here in in the late 70's. Very dry!

 

[zogger]

Nice (mostly) memories man!

 

[kingOFgEEEks]

Here's to the memories.

 

[Hinerman]

I drive by my deceased Grandparent's house all the time. I grew up and lived with them until I was in my 20's. No working fireplace, they covered it with a bookshelf. The house is empty and should be condemned soon. My kids want me to drive by there and tell them stories all the time. I get choked up thinking about them and that old house.

Another one for the memories.

 

[Red Elm]

It amazes me how deep some memories can become ingrained in who we are and who we become. I'm glad you got to have that last fire buddy, I'm sure it will be a cherished memory like the rest.

 

[unclemoustache]

Thanks for sharing! There is NO MEMORY like the memory of a childhood home. I'm so glad my folks still live in their original house. My mom's childhood home was sold a few years ago - that was rather painful. Heck, nearly every day I drive by the first home we ever used as a rental (only 12 years ago, which we only owned for 5 years) and I still look at it each time. Glad you're finding such neat treasures. I wonder what it'll be like when my folks pass on. We'll all go through their stuff, sorting, keeping, selling and chucking. But what will we do with the house? It's nice to have a 'vacation home' in Montana where we visit each summer, and I'm sure we could hire someone to look after it and maintain it, but it wouldn't be the same without my folks.

 

[kingOFgEEEks]

I was trying to avoid sharing a "Cool Story, Bro", but I think I have to.

I live in the house I grew up in. My grandparents own it still - they put a double wide next to it when I was about 8, and 'downsized' into that, so my Dad, Mom, Brother and I could get out of the house trailer we were living in. Mom & Dad split, I went away to college, and life went on. Until my Dad passed away in a vehicle wreck. My Stepmom stayed in it for a year after that, but it was too much house for her, alone and in the middle of nowhere, so she downsized to a smaller place in town. There I was, 31, with a wife and 2 kids, with a third on the way. I spent the entire summer of '14 cleaning out and fixing that house up, and we moved into it that August.

It was an amazing process, and I hadn't realized that I hadn't grieved my Dad's loss until I was doing it through the act of fixing the house up. There were so many times that I wanted to ask him - "Where did you run this wire after this box?", "What was your plan with this?", and the too-often said "Really Dad, how did you expect this to hold up?"

I know that your Mom is still here, at least physically, but I hope that spending this time cleaning out the old house gave you the same closure that I got. I know it's tough, but so worth it.

 

[svk]

I was trying to avoid sharing a "Cool Story, Bro", but I think I have to.

I live in the house I grew up in. My grandparents own it still - they put a double wide next to it when I was about 8, and 'downsized' into that, so my Dad, Mom, Brother and I could get out of the house trailer we were living in. Mom & Dad split, I went away to college, and life went on. Until my Dad passed away in a vehicle wreck. My Stepmom stayed in it for a year after that, but it was too much house for her, alone and in the middle of nowhere, so she downsized to a smaller place in town. There I was, 31, with a wife and 2 kids, with a third on the way. I spent the entire summer of '14 cleaning out and fixing that house up, and we moved into it that August.

It was an amazing process, and I hadn't realized that I hadn't grieved my Dad's loss until I was doing it through the act of fixing the house up. There were so many times that I wanted to ask him - "Where did you run this wire after this box?", "What was your plan with this?", and the too-often said "Really Dad, how did you expect this to hold up?"

I know that your Mom is still here, at least physically, but I hope that spending this time cleaning out the old house gave you the same closure that I got. I know it's tough, but so worth it.

Yes, much closure has been achieved. To put it mildly our relationship has been strained for the past few years. This gave me the opportunity to go through things without her interrupting and causing drama. For the past few years she'd call and tell me to come get stuff then when I'd go there she wouldn't want me to take any of it. I finally gave up on that game last winter when she continued to decline and become more aggressive.

I'm also very thankful for my in laws. They aren't perfect (who is?) but have been wonderful grandparents to my children when my dad couldn't and my mom wouldn't.

 

[svk]

If I lived in the area I would have had no problem buying my parents or grandparents (which my grandpa built) homes. But work is too far away and my main focus is keeping up the two cabins when I'm up this way. Maybe in another life.

I drive by my grandparents house once a year, usually when I go to the cemetery where they and my dad are buried. The folks who bought it kind of let it slip for a few years but it's been improving recently. I doubt it will ever be immaculate like my grandparents kept it before they started slipping but I've got that memory in my mind vault.

 

[Marine5068]

I know how you feel. I have similar memories of Family home and try to remember all the good things we did there and fun with my Dad who has passed on many years back. My Mom lost the house due to mental illness and a serious gambling addiction and has now been diagnosed with lung and kidney cancer. Those feelings are such sweet sorrow. Nice to be able to have a final fire and take lasting photos for that memory. Good luck to you and keep telling the Family stories to the next generations.

 

[USMC615]

I've referenced it in the scrounging thread but I'll just give a quick recap.

My mom has developed very severe mental illness and as of last spring could no longer stay in her home. My aunt (her sister, who is unwilling to accept how bad her condition really is despite my attempts to get her additional help) moved her to a senior apartment which failed miserably and she ended up in assisted living. We finally convinced her to sell the house and it closes around the end of this month. I now live a couple hours away but with the help of my inlaws have been here getting my stuff as well out as well as going through papers etc so we can close. Luckily the buyers are taking it as is so it doesn't need to be completely cleaned out. But I'm still going through the place drawer by drawer and have found some wonderful treasures of low monetary but high intrinsic value such as my grandpa's cousin's Purple Heart and letters from my grandparents, etc.

The house is an old Victorian style home with lots of beautiful woodwork, crown moldings, and so on. The outside is getting long in the tooth but inside is like a church especially since my mom redid almost the entire inside after my dad died before she became very reclusive.

Anyhow. Enough of that stuff. This will probably be the last night I'll ever spend here (I lived here my entire life up to age 18) so I lit up the old fireplace for one final fire. We had lots of good times here while my dad was alive in this living room with grandparents, other relatives, and friends.

View attachment 485243 View attachment 485244

The wood room in the basement (complete with coal door to load from outside). This wood was probably put here in in the late 70's. Very dry!
View attachment 485245

I salute you brother...a Final Fire is a very fitting tribute to the times you spent there growing up...good times, sad times, different, indifferent. It's all a part of that thing we call life.

Good on you Steve.

 

[Cody]

I drive by my grandparents house once a year, usually when I go to the cemetery where they and my dad are buried. The folks who bought it kind of let it slip for a few years but it's been improving recently. I doubt it will ever be immaculate like my grandparents kept it before they started slipping but I've got that memory in my mind vault.

Funny how that goes, I always tell myself that this is the last damn time I drive by here. I'm sure it won't be, even though I can see it in my head clear as day.

 

[svk]

A long day of packing and hauling. Started at 8 am, rolled into the cabin with the second load at midnight. Light load tomorrow morning and I'm done. Now I have another stall worth of stuff to sort through in the pole barn once spring rolls around. My 8 car garage litterally has a 20' boat and the rest is clutter. Someday it will all be organized.

Found a very cool letter from my grandpa outlining the history of our family tree farm. Until yesterday I never knew that he and my great grandpa spent the winter out there in gypo shack logging during the 20's. The shack was on the portion of land that my great grandpa sold off in the 30's.

How is this for community helping their citizens: The city he lived in would have one of their employees come around with a semi truck and load up your pulp logs (in his case over 20 miles from town) and get enough from several other residents who also had wood lots then drive to town and unload them in your yard so you could cut and process them. I couldn't believe it!

 

[Backyard Lumberjack]

feels warm on several fronts! glad you got to do that, and glad we got to see it. beautiful fire! I can hear the distant din of family, laffter, snow falling... and youth entering adolescence... all the while Dad stokes the fire in the fireplace...

thanks for sharing all the warmth!

 

[olyman]

A long day of packing and hauling. Started at 8 am, rolled into the cabin with the second load at midnight. Light load tomorrow morning and I'm done. Now I have another stall worth of stuff to sort through in the pole barn once spring rolls around. My 8 car garage litterally has a 20' boat and the rest is clutter. Someday it will all be organized.

Found a very cool letter from my grandpa outlining the history of our family tree farm. Until yesterday I never knew that he and my great grandpa spent the winter out there in gypo shack logging during the 20's. The shack was on the portion of land that my great grandpa sold off in the 30's.

How is this for community helping their citizens: The city he lived in would have one of their employees come around with a semi truck and load up your pulp logs (in his case over 20 miles from town) and get enough from several other residents who also had wood lots then drive to town and unload them in your yard so you could cut and process them. I couldn't believe it!

gypo shack sounds like lambert!!

 

[svk]

gypo shack sounds like lambert!!

It even had two rooms!

 

[PA. Woodsman]

Wow, what a sad but also touching story. Sorry to hear about your mom, very tough when close family falls ill. But I am glad that you were able to go back in time if you will and discover so many great memories. I hope that things work out for the best for you....

 

[husqvarna257]

In my parents house there were two fireplaces, one in a den and one just behind it in a living room . I can remember plenty of times as a kid we had a fire in the den fireplace but the living room never got used. My parents went to AZ for the winter for years and my wife and I were building our house so we stayed there until we finished. My wife and I were tempted to use the living room fireplace but decided the mess would upset my mother when they came back in the spring. My parents house was to big for them and my sister had a place near her for elderly housing so we helped them pack up and sell the old house. Come to find out the new owners had the idea to run both fireplaces at once and it started a fire in the wall with significant damage to the house, but everyone in the house got out fine. Now that it is rebuilt it looks different so I stopped driving by. Am I ever glad I never lit the living room fire pace. I can still remember the times as a kid that the old fireplace would blow smoke back in until my father put a glass screen door in. He came to our house and saw the Vermont Castings going and was happy to see it never smoked us out of the house

 

[svk]

Made the last loads out yesterday morning. Nothing left in there but some furniture and decorations for the new owners, some bags of clothing that my cousin will haul to Salvation Army, and a whole lot of memories.

Now my aunt and cousin just need to make sure they can get my mom to sign the papers at closing. My aunt has kind of been a POS during this ordeal but my cousin (from my dad's side) should be nominated for sainthood.

 

[husqvarna257]

Made the last loads out yesterday morning. Nothing left in there but some furniture and decorations for the new owners, some bags of clothing that my cousin will haul to Salvation Army, and a whole lot of memories.

Now my aunt and cousin just need to make sure they can get my mom to sign the papers at closing. My aunt has kind of been a POS during this ordeal but my cousin (from my dad's side) should be nominated for sainthood.

Hope it all goes well for you and your Mom. Never a fun time cleaning the house for a final time. Amazing how much stuff there can be and what to do with it.