So when I was a kid and we were heating with wood, I remember my dad had this paper he copied from the bulletin board at work, with a comical list of the true cost of heating with wood. It went something like this (going from memory, so missing a lot): 1. Stove $1200 2. Chainsaw $200 … 4. Donation to local Vol Fire Dept for 1st chimney fire response $100 … 7. Redneck tow to get pickup truck out of mud (AAA doesn't go into the woods) $50 … 10. Emergency room bill to get splinters out of eye $250 … 13. Donation to local Vol Fire Dept for 2nd chimney fire response $100 … 15. New coffee table (old one chopped up and burned while drunk) $400 … 17. Chiropractor bill for herniated discs in back $300 … And the grand finale was "divorce settlement" to the tune of $25,000 or so. Has anyone seen this list? I'd love to get a copy of the actual list for old time's sake. I'd guess it was around 1980 or so when it was circulating around, way before the internet. It was pretty funny (way better than the limited stuff I can remember).