If ya want cute, watch for that friggin poodle from next door.Catch em in the front yard taking a dump, put a nice clean shot between the eyes, and tear the ribbon off and make up a nice cute bundle.That will be sure to wow the wife.
Okay, just kidding.Ive tried everything, and being short on patience, I decided to show the wife how to make a fire man style.Sure, you might lose a few eyebrows, but nothing wakes the whole clan up faster than dad racing through the living room in his skivvies with his bangs on fire.I have been known to invent six new cusswords before reaching the sink.
Ive tried nice little tupperware boxes, she left it too close to the stove and it melted.We had a grand old time one evening trying to guess what the hell it was.Kept us intertained for hours.We are simple folks I reckon.
I tried a nice little wicker basket I bought from some mexican at the flea market, he didnt have any arms and wove it with his toes.The dog wasnt impressed, and managed to chew it down to the floor in one long night to pay me back for not giving him is nightly hot dog.
Took some time and made a real nice sturdy little rack out of wrought iron. Came home one day and found that the wife thought it worked better as a stepping stool for the kitchen.
Made a nice little box out of oak strips.Rounded the bottom so that it couldnt be flipped over and stood on, dog wouldnt chew it,and it wouldnt melt. Last time I saw it, it was out on the front porch with some kinda stupid weed looking things in it, my daughter proudly claimed later it was her "herb" garden.I always thought "herbs" grew in walmart somewhere, but I hear you can grow the dang things too.
Nope, gave up on kindling.