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Expensive Funeral

Discussion in 'Joke and Funny Picture Forum' started by Gugi47, Jun 10, 2018.

  1. Gugi47

    Gugi47 ArboristSite Hit Man

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    Expensive Funeral

    Joe passed away. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral. As the last guests departed the affair, his wife, Helen, turned to her oldest friend, Jodi. “Well, I’m sure Joe would be pleased,” she said.

    “I’m sure you’re right,” replied Jody, who lowered her voice and leaned in close. “How much did this really cost?”

    “All of it?” said Helen. “Thirty thousand.”

    “No!” Jody exclaimed. “I mean, it was very nice, but $30,000?”

    Helen answered, “The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to the church. The wake, food and drinks were another $500. The rest went for the memorial stone.”

    Jody computed quickly. “$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?!”

    “Two and a half carats.”
     
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  2. Huskybill

    Huskybill ArboristSite Guru

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    I told my family to sit me up on a park bench in the park. Or that $1,000 cremation sounds good no worry about a half suit right?

    We aren’t leaving this life so easy too.
     
  3. blades

    blades Addicted to ArboristSite

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    Cremation - $1000? Around here it more like $6500 - plus various transportation charges and county medical examiner , might have been one or 2 other little things besides all told about $9k- and no wake stuff at all.
     
  4. ValleyFirewood

    ValleyFirewood Addicted to ArboristSite

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    Throw me in an old fridge box and bury me in the woods somewhere.
     
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  5. boltonranger

    boltonranger ArboristSite Operative

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    That might generate a “Homeless man found dead.” story and investigation.
     
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  6. Huskybill

    Huskybill ArboristSite Guru

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    A local bill board sign says there running a $1,000 special for cremation.
     
  7. blades

    blades Addicted to ArboristSite

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    Maybe a $1k discount?
     
  8. Huskybill

    Huskybill ArboristSite Guru

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    Maybe one big bon fire? Cheaper group rates?
     
  9. ValleyFirewood

    ValleyFirewood Addicted to ArboristSite

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    It's actually legal to have a cemetery on your property here.... same with many other states.

    Dig hole with excavator, throw in the box, fill.
     
  10. boltonranger

    boltonranger ArboristSite Operative

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    That’s interesting...!
     
  11. Gugi47

    Gugi47 ArboristSite Hit Man

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    Only in a farm land, not in development.
    Minimum 15 acres and have to be 50 feets from your property line.
     
  12. ValleyFirewood

    ValleyFirewood Addicted to ArboristSite

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    Nope.
     
  13. 1Alpha1

    1Alpha1 100% USDA certified abnormality-free.

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    Depends on who's looking for me.....and why.
    Within the last 8 yrs., my youngest brother, my mother and my father have passed.

    All were cremated. Cremation costs were about $1200.00 at the most.
     

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