My electric chainsaw would have eliminated the risk to tender young minds in about 15 seconds. Gym towel to cover it, ...buzz, ...trash can with liner, then into the dumpster. The janitors can take care of the 3/4" (2cm) stump on the floor. A common scraper will probably do the trick. As senior tricks go, that is probably one of the better ones I have heard of. Nobody was hurt nor insulted.