You might be a logger if...

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You have ever fixed a wonky fuse by sticking one of them inline fuse holders in the hole so that it works but is still sorta safe.

If you've ever used a marlin spike to line up the holes on a belly pan.

patched a tire with carpet and bailing wire.

Welded a fuel tank, in the mud while it was on fire... the mud... well and the fuel tank but lets not split hairs.

Brazed fuel injector lines because replacement lines are unavailable or more then 3$.

Replaced a bad hydraulic hose using a grinder while sitting on top of a slash pile during extreme fire danger.

Pulled the motor on anything while knee deep in brush.

Just some of the crazy fixes I think of, but have at lets hear em.
 
No specific fixes, they're all common and nothing unusual. If it's a machine sooner or later it's going to need attention. Usually sooner.

But...you might be a logger if you've ever nursed a crippled machine along all day, drove 100 miles round trip for parts after quitting time, and spent the rest of the night laying in the dirt, fixing whatever was broke, using a weak flashlight and your pickup headlights to see by.
Then you eat the Donettos that you got when you picked up the parts, drink the last of the luke warm stale coffee in your thermos, and scrunch up on the pickup seat for a couple of hours of very poor sleep until the first trucks start coming in. You bum a cup of hot and reasonably fresh coffee from the first driver, give him an extra good load, and start your day all over again.
 
You might be a logger if everyone asks you if you've seen any elk 4 weeks before hunting season like clockwork.
You might be a logger if you tell them, "haven't seen any in a while" then shoot yours opening week on a lunch break, drag it to the delimber with the skidder and load it into the back of your truck, then go back to work.
 
You might be a Logger

...If you give the paper towel dispenser in the public restroom a couple extra pulls while looking at the air hand driers next to it to support the timber industry.

...If, when you come home and your kids have learned to ask "can I hug you Dad or are you too gross and dirty?"

...If you cringe and shudder when all you neighbors run their power equipment way too rich and just at part throttle.

...If you have thrown stuff you know you shouldn't into the brush pile hoping it will burn if its hot enough.

...If you lose track counting the scars on your hands.

...If you start your all your fires with petroleum based products.

...If you say "Huh?" or "What?" A LOT.
 
You might be a logger.... if the washing machine and dryer keep getting clogged up with sawdust.

The other day I was at the Dr's office and I had to get down to my undies. The Dr walks in and goes, "where did all this sawdust on the floor come from?!" It was first thing in the morning before I had been at work and my clothes was all fresh from the wash.

You might be a logger.... if have to dig through the closet for the least stained pants and shirt when going somewhere "fancy"
 
You might be a Logger

...If you give the paper towel dispenser in the public restroom a couple extra pulls while looking at the air hand driers next to it to support the timber industry.

...If, when you come home and your kids have learned to ask "can I hug you Dad or are you too gross and dirty?"

...If you cringe and shudder when all you neighbors run their power equipment way too rich and just at part throttle.

...If you have thrown stuff you know you shouldn't into the brush pile hoping it will burn if its hot enough.

...If you lose track counting the scars on your hands.

...If you start your all your fires with petroleum based products.

...If you say "Huh?" or "What?" A LOT.

I think we should hang out some time. That sounds like me to a T. What are you up to tomorrow?
 
You might be a logger if when you tell someone that you are a logger they get a deer in the headlights look like they're not sure what that means. Then you tell them you don't work in town, that you work in the woods and no you don't split firewood for a living. Oh so you're a lumberjack, sure. It breaks their heart when you tell them you don't own an ox or oxen to drag your logs to the river to be decked until spring. Leastways around here anyways.
 
I'm working a conference instead of the woods yesterday and today, and someone said "oh your not chopping trees today" :omg:
 
You might be a logger if when you tell someone that you are a logger they get a deer in the headlights look like they're not sure what that means. Then you tell them you don't work in town, that you work in the woods and no you don't split firewood for a living. Oh so you're a lumberjack, sure. It breaks their heart when you tell them you don't own an ox or oxen to drag your logs to the river to be decked until spring. Leastways around here anyways.

One of the first V.A. Dr's I had told me I was in no shape to be swinging an ax all day.

I told him, "yeah, that's exactly what I do, just like you give patients a slug or two of whiskey and dig out a musket ball with a rusty table knife."

Hell, I don't even own an ax!
 
You might be a logger if :

You have friends visit from Kansas and they've never seen the Redwoods. You take them on a tour of Redwoods State Park.
While they're tree gazing and waxing rhapsodic and taking five hundred pictures of themselves you're thinking "I could put the landing over there, and a good haul road along that ridge, push the skid trails into the sidehill, and have the lay for the first unit running butt end to the landing and....
 
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