Here is the paper i turned in yesterday...

[teacherman]

I'm surprised they're having you do research for a freshman course. When I took mine, the course centered around writing styles and the different types of essays: narrative, comparative, process analysis, etc. I take it you're getting some college credit while still in high school?

We did 10 page research papers in freshman comp. I did mine on Charles Manson...... Now there was a character. He can not be found at Lowe's or Home Despot, either.......He was born "No Name Maddox," and grew up in orphanages. Actually was not given a name at birth. Certainly made one for himself, though. Yucko.

SawdustMaker, that's not a bad paper; you make a good point, and you back it up to a certain extent. If it were a 300+ level class, there would be an issue or two. Correcting a few minor points of grammar (common modern errors), and a fair amount of editing/reorganization would make it a fine little piece. But then, I am partial to Stihl (not that you'd know it LOL), so maybe I am not the most evenhanded judge (if it were about Husky, it would have sucked j/k). I would try to separate subtopics a bit, and reinforce each point separately. You could more effectively make the same point trimming 20% of the length.

A tip. Not commonly done in the modern era, but it works like no other. Each thought is written on a 3X5 card. No compound sentences, no complex points on one card. Just get all the info you have or can get onto these cards. Write a BUNCH of them. Then sort them out on the living room floor, organizing them by subtopic. The subtopics will naturally present themselves if you don't already have an outline in place. Keep sorting and grouping them, filling in transitions and jotting down new thoughts that arise on more index cards.

The cards let you arrange and rearrange until it begins to make sense, and to see the whole paper at once. Arrange the cards into paragraphs, each paragraph becomes a small stack, and the stacks are placed in order. Then read your paper by flipping through the cards, noticing and filling in any awkward transitions. When you have it the way you like it, turn on your computer and write it up. It is a primitive technique by modern standards, but imo more effective than any other method. My freshman comp prof, Dr. Donald Burt, REQUIRED us to do it this way, and I am glad he did. He gave me a real gift with that one. Good luck, have fun!

 

[edisto]

EXCUSE ME for leaving out "of."

"of"???

I was just picking because I have seen a lot of people addressing someone else's use of English forget to capitalize "English".

I can't count the number of times I have misspelled "misspelled" on a student's paper.

One tip Sawdustmaker: don't write the way you speak for college papers. You should try to be a little more formal. Also remember that the key to good writing is rewriting.

 

[CORNFEDMIDGET]

What do you think? Is it accurate? Short of my use of "stihl" in place of "high quality brands"

Lowes Is Not the Place to Buy a Chainsaw
Farmer Brown needs a chainsaw because he knows they are “indispensable pieces of kit when it comes to clearing pheasant pens, fencing jobs and maintaining farm woodland” (Stihl Saw). He goes to Lowe’s to satisfy this need and he finds what looks like a good deal: a 16”chain saw for $150. As far as he cares a chainsaw is a chainsaw. Without talking to any service representative, he picks up a mid-sized consumer saw and buys it as if it was anything else in the store. He is pleased with his purchase. He takes it straight home and goes to work. He takes the little bottle of oil, mixes it with a gallon of gas, and is ready to rock. He has a small tree to cut down. The saw works great and cuts the whole tree up. He then goes on to the next tree, but the saw will not start. Having noticed that the package clearly says not to take the saw back to Lowe’s, Farmer Brown calls the phone number given to find out where to take it. He soon drives back to town to find a little lawn shop that has a much nicer set of saws on the shelf than Lowes did. The guy behind the counter gives him a quick smirk and puts the saw on the bench. Suddenly he realizes that he had been sucked into a marketing gimmick pointed at the cheap, impulsive culture. This is the McDonald’s of equipment. Even though it seems good as you buy it leaves you with a crappy feeling. You get what you pay for.
Many people have had this experience. After cheaping out and blowing their money on the bottom of the line, their new saw will not work or only work on occasion. This spells frustration. While chainsaws can be compared to other equipment in many ways, chainsaws are the extreme when it comes to requiring care in order to run properly. From the oil that must be mixed into the gasoline to making sure that the filter is clean and the chain is sharp. These things will not be heard from the cashier at a home improvement warehouse. If a chainsaw buyer desires good service, a high quality product, and an enjoyable sawing experience, he or she should not shop at a mass merchandise store but rather a small saw shop.
The first problem encountered is the distinct lack of customer service. A customer would have a hard time finding an associate that knew enough to help with a chainsaw purchase. These stores exchange front end customer service for back end service. Both Lowe’s and Home Depot will give you your money back if you ask, but that really helps nothing. Sure the customer is no longer mad, but Lowes then has a useless piece of junk. At a dedicated saw shop, the customer is taken care of up front. The customer can ask questions and get helpful answers from a knowledgeable associate. According to Buisiness Economics, Stihl products are sold exclusively by independent dealers. Stihl even advertizes that they do not sell their saws in Lowes or Home Depot. This is like a promise of customer service. It upholds the Stihl brand image by limiting bad experiences (Deneen and Gross).
Despite a very similar engine layout, the high-quality Stihl 025 and a similar sized mass marketed Poulan are night and day. The Poulan has a very cheap crankshaft; it is clearly just stamped metal plating. The seals around the bearings are insufficient. The cylinder even has a couple of huge seams in the wall that can only damage the piston. The Stihl has a very high quality engine. The crank and bearings are well made, and the cylinder and the piston are made by a respected company that has made pistons and cylinders for Stihl for more than thirty years. Made primarily in the US and Germany, Stihl has forty-million saws to its credit and a brand image that every saw it sells must match up to. Professional arborists pay top dollar for saws such as Stihls; even the small saws that professionals use for climbing cost $650. They pay because the “safety, weight, ease of handling, and vibration suppression” are worth the price (McCafferty). Compare that to Poulans which are made in China, no name to back them and with an income in small consumer saws that you can even buy at Wal-Mart. In a personal interview, Dr. Ross Wagenseil said that it would be worth doubling the price of a chainsaw for reliability and product support that Lowes and Home Depot saws do not offer.
Whether professional or light duty and cheap, chainsaws require constant care. The chain must stay sharp and the filters must be kept clean. A chainsaw should be serviced every couple of months, but neither Lowes nor Home Depot offer this service. If you ask them where you should take it for service they will send you to a small shop nearby that you should have gone to in the first place.
Quite simply, a good saw is fun to use, while a cheap saw is a great frustration. Once someone uses a real saw, they will not use cheap saw again. There was once a story of a man who had a $200 saw that he had been happy with. Then a friend let him use a professional model and he was ready to spend $700 on a nice saw the next day. This is commonly known in some circles as Chainsaw Addition Disorder (C.A.D.). It is highly contagious and someone who has run frustrating saws and is introduced to a real saw is instantly infected. Once a nice saw is invested in sawing up blow-downs or firewood is made enjoyable.
What if someone can’t afford $400 for a saw? That is perfectly understandable. Fortunately it is not necessary to spend that much. Stihl’s chainsaw product line starts around $200. Used saws are also an option. Good condition Stihl professional saws can be found for Two- to Three-hundred dollars.
This is valid for more than just chainsaws. Whether it is a cordless drill or a lawn mower, a motorcycle or a sewing machine, remember that when a cheap item is purchased, it may not only lack features but also come with a headache. Someone in Farmer Brown’s place should take the saw back to Lowes and take the $200 to buy a smaller but more reliable Stihl.



Deneen, Michael A., and Andrew C. Gross. "The global market for power tools." Business Economics 41.3 (July 2006): 66(8). Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
McCafferty, Phil. "Do you need a professional-grade machine?." Horticulture, The Magazine of American Gardening 74.n8 (Oct 1996): 62(2). Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
"Stihl saw. (Machinery)." Farmers Weekly (July 30, 2004): 2. Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
Wagenseil, Ross, professor of engineering. Personal interview. 7 Apr. 2009

Pops purchased a little husky 350 at lowes for $75 with a case, apparently someone returned it (at first you make it sound like the customer can't return the saw, but is subject to having a hole-in-the wall engine shop hack away at it. Then you say a customer can return for a full refund?). For the 2 cords of wood he cuts a year, it seems to work just find. Probably will last a long time.

Are we to assume just because it is a Stihl dealer, we will automatically receive "good" customer service. I've been disappointed by service at some Stihl dealerships, especially in the last few years. Can you return a used Stihl chainsaw for a full refund at a dealer? Explain to the salesman, "I couldn't cut right with that saw, and I will never own another Stihl" It appears you can return a used chainsaw to Lowes for refund.

Best of luck with your paper.

 

[THALL10326]

Pops purchased a little husky 350 at lowes for $75 with a case, apparently someone returned it (at first you make it sound like the customer can't return the saw, but is subject to having a hole-in-the wall engine shop hack away at it. Then you say a customer can return for a full refund?). For the 2 cords of wood he cuts a year, it seems to work just find. Probably will last a long time.

Are we to assume just because it is a Stihl dealer, we will automatically receive "good" customer service. I've been disappointed by service at some Stihl dealerships, especially in the last few years. Can you return a used Stihl chainsaw for a full refund at a dealer? Explain to the salesman, "I couldn't cut right with that saw, and I will never own another Stihl" It appears you can return a used chainsaw to Lowes for refund.

Best of luck with your paper.

Returns are abit different with shops verses the mass merchant. We don't play the game of the man sawing up that one tree that fell behind the house and now he wants his money back, he's done with the saw. The mass merchant will hand him his money back, no questions asked most times. Small shops can't afford to do what the multi billion mass merchants can do. If there is a fault with the saw we will gladly take it back and give full refund, if the fault is the owner getting his little job done tuff luck, he should have rented one instead of buying one.

A few years ago I sold a small Stihl tiller to a man. His first question was "can I bring it back if I don't like the way it digs". I said no sir, if you just wanna dig up your area at your house and then bring it back because your done doesn't fly here. He broke out in a big grin and admitted thats exactly what he had in mind doing. He still bought the tiller which surprized me. He musta liked how it digged,LOL

 

[Wild Knight]

What do you think? Is it accurate? Short of my use of "stihl" in place of "high quality brands"

Lowes Is Not the Place to Buy a Chainsaw
2009

Can you tell me the specifics of the assignment? What were the instructions? What were you supposed to write and turn in?

 

[CORNFEDMIDGET]

Returns are abit different with shops verses the mass merchant. We don't play the game of the man sawing up that one tree that fell behind the house and now he wants his money back, he's done with the saw. The mass merchant will hand him his money back, no questions asked most times. Small shops can't afford to do what the multi billion mass merchants can do. If there is a fault with the saw we will gladly take it back and give full refund, if the fault is the owner getting his little job done tuff luck, he should have rented one instead of buying one.

A few years ago I sold a small Stihl tiller to a man. His first question was "can I bring it back if I don't like the way it digs". I said no sir, if you just wanna dig up your area at your house and then bring it back because your done doesn't fly here. He broke out in a big grin and admitted thats exactly what he had in mind doing. He still bought the tiller which surprized me. He musta liked how it digged,LOL

I understand that. It isn't the point I was trying to make. The paper should address the "why the market for crappy saws". Maybe a reason is the returnability of the junk. However, I've seen a lot of poulan wildthings listed on craigslist.

 

[BayAreaBucker]

Get tom trees to write'em for ya.

:jawdrop: I'm laughing hysterically right now and think that would be the most spectacular piece of literature written since the declaration of independence!

 

[2000ssm6]

Good paper, fits the cheap pos saw to a "T"!

 

[ShoerFast]

Just my $0.02 cents worth....

I like it!

Good Content, it really shows where you stand on this, and that you know your saws, that is clear.

You really make your case, you put it in a story very well. I would go saw shopping with you any day, your idea of quality stands out.

I do struggle with writing, but I work on this, maybe we can learn a few things together here?

Just asking ideas with the changes I added, if I may? ..........

What do you think? Is it accurate? Short of my use of "stihl" in place of "high quality brands"

Why Box Stores May Not Be the Place to Buy a Chainsaw?

If Farmer Brown needs a chainsaw because he knows they are “indispensable pieces of kit (or equipment?) when it comes to clearing pheasant pens, fencing jobs and maintaining farm woodland” (Stihl Saw).

He may go to a big box store to satisfy this need and he finds what looks like a good deal? a 16”chain saw for $150. As far as he cares a chainsaw is a chainsaw. Without talking to any service representative, he picks up a mid-sized consumer saw and buys it as if it was not anything else in the store. He is pleased with his purchase.

He takes it straight home rips open the box while standing on the owners manual (cause thats what I do) and goes to work. He takes the little bottle of oil, mixes it with a gallon of gas, and is ready to rock. He has a small tree to cut down. The saw works great and cuts the whole tree up. He then goes on to the next tree, but the saw will not start. Having noticed that the package clearly says not to take the saw back to Lowe’s, Farmer Brown calls the phone number given to find out where to take it. He soon drives back to town to find a little lawn shop that has a much nicer set of saws on the shelf than Lowes did. The guy behind the counter gives him a quick smirk and puts the saw on the bench. Suddenly he realizes that he had been sucked into a marketing gimmick pointed at the cheap, impulsive culture. This is the McDonald’s of equipment. Even though it seems good as you buy it leaves you with a crappy feeling. You get what you pay for.
Many people have had this experience. After cheaping out and blowing their money on the bottom of the line, their new saw will not work or only work on occasion. This spells frustration. While chainsaws can be compared to other equipment in many ways, chainsaws are the extreme when it comes to requiring care in order to run properly. From the oil that must be mixed into the gasoline to making sure that the filter is clean and the chain is sharp. These things will not be heard from the cashier at a home improvement warehouse. If a chainsaw buyer desires good service, a high quality product, and an enjoyable sawing experience, he or she should not shop at a mass merchandise store but rather a small saw shop.
The first problem encountered is the distinct lack of customer service. A customer would have a hard time finding an associate that knew enough to help with a chainsaw purchase. These stores exchange front end customer service for back end service. Both Lowe’s and Home Depot will give you your money back if you ask, but that really helps nothing. Sure the customer is no longer mad, but Lowes then has a useless piece of junk. At a dedicated saw shop, the customer is taken care of up front. The customer can ask questions and get helpful answers from a knowledgeable associate. According to Buisiness Economics, Stihl products are sold exclusively by independent dealers. Stihl even advertizes that they do not sell their saws in Lowes or Home Depot. This is like a promise of customer service. It upholds the Stihl brand image by limiting bad experiences (Deneen and Gross).
Despite a very similar engine layout, the high-quality Stihl 025 and a similar sized mass marketed Poulan are night and day. The Poulan has a very cheap crankshaft; it is clearly just stamped metal plating. The seals around the bearings are insufficient. The cylinder even has a couple of huge seams in the wall that can only damage the piston. The Stihl has a very high quality engine. The crank and bearings are well made, and the cylinder and the piston are made by a respected company that has made pistons and cylinders for Stihl for more than thirty years. Made primarily in the US and Germany, Stihl has forty-million saws to its credit and a brand image that every saw it sells must match up to. Professional arborists pay top dollar for saws such as Stihls; even the small saws that professionals use for climbing cost $650. They pay because the “safety, weight, ease of handling, and vibration suppression” are worth the price (McCafferty). Compare that to Poulans which are made in China, no name to back them and with an income in small consumer saws that you can even buy at Wal-Mart. In a personal interview, Dr. Ross Wagenseil said that it would be worth doubling the price of a chainsaw for reliability and product support that Lowes and Home Depot saws do not offer.
Whether professional or light duty and cheap, chainsaws require constant care. The chain must stay sharp and the filters must be kept clean. A chainsaw should be serviced every couple of months, but neither Lowes nor Home Depot offer this service. If you ask them where you should take it for service they will send you to a small shop nearby that you should have gone to in the first place.
Quite simply, a good saw is fun to use, while a cheap saw is a great frustration. Once someone uses a real saw, they will not use cheap saw again. There was once a story of a man who had a $200 saw that he had been happy with. Then a friend let him use a professional model and he was ready to spend $700 on a nice saw the next day. This is commonly known in some circles as Chainsaw Addition Disorder (C.A.D.). It is highly contagious and someone who has run frustrating saws and is introduced to a real saw is instantly infected. Once a nice saw is invested in sawing up blow-downs or firewood is made enjoyable.
What if someone can’t afford $400 for a saw? That is perfectly understandable. Fortunately it is not necessary to spend that much. Stihl’s chainsaw product line starts around $200. Used saws are also an option. Good condition Stihl professional saws can be found for Two- to Three-hundred dollars.
This is valid for more than just chainsaws. Whether it is a cordless drill or a lawn mower, a motorcycle or a sewing machine, remember that when a cheap item is purchased, it may not only lack features but also come with a headache. Someone in Farmer Brown’s place should take the saw back to Lowes and take the $200 to buy a smaller but more reliable Stihl.



Deneen, Michael A., and Andrew C. Gross. "The global market for power tools." Business Economics 41.3 (July 2006): 66(8). Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
McCafferty, Phil. "Do you need a professional-grade machine?." Horticulture, The Magazine of American Gardening 74.n8 (Oct 1996): 62(2). Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
"Stihl saw. (Machinery)." Farmers Weekly (July 30, 2004): 2. Academic OneFile. Gale. Tri-County Technical College Library. 7 Apr. 2009 <http://liboc.tctc.edu:2052/itx/start.do?prodId=AONE>.
Wagenseil, Ross, professor of engineering. Personal interview. 7 Apr. 2009

If you can pick op on my ideas?

Stepping back and looking at how the story flows? adding some 'white space to brake up the ideas of the story.

Sometime just stepping away from the project, not looking at a clock or how many words are required, but having fun with your original idea, but at the same time writing it so that someone that really is not that interested in the subject will stihl really enjoy the read!

As mentioned, I struggle with these things, but there are some fantastic witters here and at your school that will share there views, just as someone shared theirs with them somewhere along the way.

It was mentioned a C- , rewrite it and post it again if you would like, we can be sure that someone will regrade it,,,,, there is an A+ in there, just bring it out!

Have fun!

 

[nilzlofgren]

honestly??????

C-

-i understand you thesis: that it is better to pay more for a saw which is likely of better quality and will be backed by a better trained service department. but you wander all over this paper trying to make that point. much of what you have is disjointed with no supporting arguements, and i am not sure that someone with no chainsaw knowledge can read your paper and understand why you say what you do.
-you have citations footnoted, but there is no reference in the body of you essay. what style are you supposed to be using? APA
-you use opening and concluding statements randomly.
-at least your grammar, punctuation and spelling are passable.


if you like, i can get one our english instructors to take a look at it.

And, I've never seen the word "crappy", or the phrase "useless piece of junk" in a thesis. It needs to be professionally written. I'd would be a nice teacher though, and give you the chance to rewrite, and or correct it before you hand it in. Also, you may want to remove the C.A.D. line. You wont be able to cite it, it is made up.

 

[THALL10326]

I say that paper should get a A plus. If the teacher grades it low someone send me his address. Alittle tap on the noggin with the ole Louisville Slugger will change his tune. Sounds ruff I know but think what Tony Soprano would do to the guy,hehhe

 

[spacemule]

I say that paper should get a A plus. If the teacher grades it low someone send me his address. Alittle tap on the noggin with the ole Louisville Slugger will change his tune. Sounds ruff I know but think what Tony Soprano would do to the guy,hehhe

What color is the sky in your world?

 

[CentaurG2]

Get tom trees to write'em for ya.
Just don't forget to take off the tom trees :hmm3grin2orange:

somewhere in the mists of my scrambled mind I recall that eecummins was not using punctuation long before tom trees perhaps imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

 

[teacherman]

Get tom trees to write'em for ya.
Just don't forget to take off the tom trees :hmm3grin2orange:

all my teacher dead gone loony tom trees

If there were a minimum length I'd get Calvin to do it a 1000 word sentence would be hilarious as a teacher I see all kinds of stuff but writing is the most difficult thing to grade and improve upon it is hard to know where to start because you have to rewrite the whole thing that is why I teach math and science so I can deal with more concrete concepts no offense meant please understand I am just using it as a great example of how to drive the prof out of his tree without cutting it down with a Power Horse chainsaw in case the Power Horse won't start

 

[THALL10326]

What color is the sky in your world?

Its a nice pretty blue with white clouds galore. Why ya ask, you planning on flying over,hahaha

 

[Sawdustmaker]

So, do i give him a link to this thread?

 

[THALL10326]

So, do i give him a link to this thread?

Heck yeah. Tell him to sign up and become a member as well. He'll find enough info in here to see first hand your paper is right,

 

[thomas72]

I am glad I got all of those papers done years ago. Just as mentioned earlier. It is best to to leave opinions out of a research paper, unless it is a professional opinion about the topic. For example, you could email Thall or Lakeside and ask for their professional opinion, then cite from the email they send you. The profs really like it when you find new means to gather info. Most of the time if you talk to the professor during office hours before you turn in the paper they will generally help you out. It is not cheating to ask for their critique on your paper.

 

[volks-man]

If there were a minimum length I'd get Calvin to do it a 1000 word sentence would be hilarious as a teacher I see all kinds of stuff but writing is the most difficult thing to grade and improve upon it is hard to know where to start because you have to rewrite the whole thing that is why I teach math and science so I can deal with more concrete concepts no offense meant please understand I am just using it as a great example of how to drive the prof out of his tree without cutting it down with a Power Horse chainsaw in case the Power Horse won't start

 

[Sawdustmaker]

another research paper due in four weeks what should do that one on?

i think i will do it on the effects of CAD and get a govt grant to fund it!!