You can become a Supporting Member which comes with a decal or just click here to donate.
Its coming believe me. I went a little nuts at first cause I just lost my childhood things, thousands of dollars in hobby quality rc car ****, and 3 motorcycles just for starters. But I'm taking a step back and being patient until I get an attorney cause she's broken so many laws her ass should be in jail but the DA keep saying its a civil matter which is total ********.
Since when is arson a civil matter? That is BS! Will insurance cover any of it? Sorry man, that stinks.
Yea I know about that all too well I haven't had power to my house in almost 2 years. Every job I could get other then my trade is pointless cause its all taken by debt and child support and with the motorcycle industry hurting and my location being very few dealers and shops to turn wrenches at im just kinda stuck un til I can magically get an attorney. Idk most days I wonder what the hell im even doing and just want to give up and waste away. I've had to do terrible terrible things just to survive to make it to tomorrow's next challenge and its never ending. I tell people I don't live to have a life that part of me is gone. Now I live for survival like a caveman or something my brain has bein rewired to think and prioritize things so differently its given me panic attacks and huge anxiety issues I never used to have. Sorry for going on like that. I just don't have anyone to talk to so I get alittle carried away with strangers.
Don't give up man! Many of us here have been where you are right now. It is overwhelming at times. You will dig out. Find a way to make a little something on the side to squirrel away. I promise you, you will look back on these times and laugh. It is definitely not funny, but hang in there. There are things worth fighting through, and this is one of them. Everything happens for a reason. You don't sound like the quitting type. Is there any way that I can help? Let me know.
You know your not the first one to say I don't seem like the quitting type and honestly I'm typically the opposite which is why she has a vpo against me and I have 2 warrants for asking her if I could see my 2 year old boy and newborn daughter and give them there Christmas gifts last year. I know God has his plan for everyone and to just say on the path and eventually things will be better but I dont know if I can be normal again. I have anxiety attacks in crowds now and the more confused I am at why I feel that way the more I freak out and just leave without buying food and stuff. There's an unbelievable amount to what she's done to me. So much that I've had 2 law enforcement officers ask me why she's still breathing. I'm just lost I guess and I'm waiting for someone to pull me up idk. I barley sleep cause of the dreams of the way everything was before and I wake up either screaming and breaking **** or crying so hard I can't breathe. Anyway man I truly appreciate that alot and if I do I will and if you really need a saw as bad as I need a lawyer send me your address and ill get you one coming.
Sounds like PTSD to me, I'd smile and say everything will be perfect someday but frankly I doubt that things will ever be "normal" again. It will get better, though. I've seen a few guys with those kinda problems reach a better place, not perfect mind you, but way better. Just hang in there. I know you won't quit and you know you won't quit, but sometimes it helps to have someone remind you every now and again. One of the better tips I've heard is to just take a few deeps breaths when you're starting to freak out. After you take a few deep breaths, just remind yourself that you can do this and you won't freak out. Another good tip I've heard is to start journaling. Late at night when you can't sleep, write down those memories that are keeping you up, put names to those emotions, and just articulate your feelings. Lastly, while this may sound a bit harsh, from the way it sounds the only guy that's gonna pull you up is you. No matter how hard it seems, just take that first step towards recovering your life.
No problem man, you are right, he has a plan for everything. I know you get questions like you said about why is she still breathing and sh**, that is the guy over the other shoulder trying to break you, don't go down that road. As far as normal, what is normal? We are all different, as woodslasher says, might be PTSD. I don't know as I am not a shrink, and I am not saying you need one. I believe he sends angels to help when you need help, I have always seemed to get that lifeline when I am having my worst moments. Do I need any saws? Define Need! What do you have? I have in my lineup at this moment, a great running Shindaiwa 488, a Wild Thing that is indestructible, a Stihl 029Super that is about to get a transplant to an 039, a Shinny 695 that is going to need a piston, I think. 2 Jonsered 2094's that are being rebuilt.
If anyone can relate to how much “some” women can mess up your life, it’s me. But like Lnk said, these times will pass and it’ll all be headlights in the rear view mirror brother. Sometimes it feels like it’ll never pass but it will. After I left my wife, i lived in an old camper in the middle of my family farm, my business was tied up in the courts so I couldn’t work, I’d drink whiskey from sun up to sun down just to numb everything I was feeling. But I’ve got a great and very close family. My dad loaned me the money to outfit a new work trailer so I could get back to work. I had to start from square one with a customer base again so I wasn’t able to get a savings account to last me through the winter like I use to be able to do. But hey, it’s a start. No longer looking through the bottom of a bottle, got recently hired back into the field I spent 24 years in and now have a January start date due to a slow background check and missing the December training school.
Not harsh at all its true. I do hold myself back alot. I just really need out of this damn state where I can just start from scratch. Thank you for your encouraging words I do need to hear that more often then not. I've got a couple lines on some work cause thats really what I need to move forward is some kind of income.
Appreciate that. No I had you confused i guess. Thats ok I'm pretty saw poor compared to most only having 7. I really wish my 028 would freaking run but it needs a updated coil and my ms250c is just a pain in the ass to work on but the other 5 are very reliable even my ridiculously modified ms180c on 100% methanol.
Ran one once, ran pretty good, decent power. Remember it being heavy for the power though. Unless I miss-remember.
