Advice on logging my 800 acres

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bitzer

******** Timber Expert
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I have 800 acres that I'm going to be logging alone. It is full of straight 100' tall walnut and chestnut with a sprinkling of mature redwoods. I will be using a toboggan and my blue-tick coon hound sled team to skid the logs in order to minimize impact. We also average 240" of snow a year so I will be working in snowshoes all day. How much will I get paid for this and when? Please keep the replies under one well written and organized paragraph where you take 20-30 minutes to sum up your life's knowledge on the subject.

PS: You can kiss my ass goodbye because you will never hear from me again.

Sincerely,

Dude who has already made up his mind, but just needs some type of group confirmation.
 
You should clear atleast 2.4 Million
The Log Buyers will always pay up front in cash, always
If you have a bad day and don't get any logs to the mill I'm sure they will understand and still pay you in advance for the next days pay
 
Dammit Bitz, you know dogs are no good for skidding. What you want is a couple dozen alley cats all pissed-off and harnessed up. They'll wind each other up enough that your biggest job will be roundin' 'em all up for the next turn.

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here through Thursday.
 
I have 800 acres that I'm going to be logging alone. It is full of straight 100' tall walnut and chestnut with a sprinkling of mature redwoods. I will be using a toboggan and my blue-tick coon hound sled team to skid the logs in order to minimize impact. We also average 240" of snow a year so I will be working in snowshoes all day. How much will I get paid for this and when? Please keep the replies under one well written and organized paragraph where you take 20-30 minutes to sum up your life's knowledge on the subject.

PS: You can kiss my ass goodbye because you will never hear from me again.

Sincerely,

Dude who has already made up his mind, but just needs some type of group hug.

fixed it for ya
 
I have 800 acres that I'm going to be logging alone. It is full of straight 100' tall walnut and chestnut with a sprinkling of mature redwoods. I will be using a toboggan and my blue-tick coon hound sled team to skid the logs in order to minimize impact. We also average 240" of snow a year so I will be working in snowshoes all day. How much will I get paid for this and when? Please keep the replies under one well written and organized paragraph where you take 20-30 minutes to sum up your life's knowledge on the subject.

PS: You can kiss my ass goodbye because you will never hear from me again.

Sincerely,

Dude who has already made up his mind, but just needs some type of group confirmation.

Dear Dude,

it seems to me you already have it figured out. Be patient, you'll get paid in the next life.

Best wishes,
Sam
 
Get rid of the snowshoes. Skis are faster, especially for going downhill chasing the runaway dogs/cats.

Why not skid with Shetland Ponies? They are cute. The photos would be priceless.
 
Get rid of the snowshoes. Skis are faster, especially for going downhill chasing the runaway dogs/cats.

Why not skid with Shetland Ponies? They are cute. The photos would be priceless.

Either that or a team of 6 or so of those little, fuzzy, grey burros. Extra points if all the pics are in black and white and all the donkeys have really tough names

"Hye on there Rocky, whoa up Titan, whoooooaaa now"
 
Dammit Bitz, you know dogs are no good for skidding. What you want is a couple dozen alley cats all pissed-off and harnessed up. They'll wind each other up enough that your biggest job will be roundin' 'em all up for the next turn.

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here through Thursday.


Actually, this is exactly how I do it. You'd be amazed how at how hard they pull with nothing but a squirt bottle in your hand.
 
All I will say is............hire a WEST COAST faller. Try it yourself, and you'll split every tree and get killed on the last one.:msp_razz:
 
All I will say is............hire a WEST COAST faller. Try it yourself, and you'll split every tree and get killed on the last one.:msp_razz:

And if you hire an EAST COAST feller you can watch him monkey around cutting 3ft. diameter trees with a 10" bar "because it's faster." He won't know it's faster though, cause he'll get hit by a widowmaker and never know it cause he cuts like the Hunchback of Notre Dame and can't see above the forester's blue stump mark :hmm3grin2orange:
 
And if you hire an EAST COAST feller you can watch him monkey around cutting 3ft. diameter trees with a 10" bar "because it's faster." He won't know it's faster though, cause he'll get hit by a widowmaker and never know it cause he cuts like the Hunchback of Notre Dame and can't see above the forester's blue stump mark :hmm3grin2orange:

See, you clearly don't know the 411. We don't have any 3' trees. Ask any west coaster!:hmm3grin2orange:
 
Ponies have an advantage. On the days when you can't work in the woods, head into town. Set up by a school or daycare center and charge for pony rides. You'll probably make more money this way and that will offset the loss of income caused from logging. :smile2:
 
All great ideas, but I talked to dude today, he will be using fainting goats for his team. In between skids he will milk them. Also, he will bore cut every single mother ####ing tree!

Hey Ole Timer and Jameson, didn't you guys learn anything from Biggie and Tupac?

Its the mid-coast where the money is made.
 
Whoo...... You all forgot the most important thing!!!!! You cant forget the consulting forester!! And I thought you all knew what you were talking about.....................
 
Don't forget, you need an old guy to ride around in a pickup. One with lots of antennas on it. His job is to lay out the job, set the strips, keep everything moving, snarl at everybody, and complain that the job is losing money. He might tell you if you're doing something right...but don't count on it.

Speaking of which...time to head up the hill.
 
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"Up Nort" will suffice as well. Represent, represent.

I also recently read that a "scandahoovian," was slang for a ciggarette in an 1880s WI logging camp.

Dunno, my mom said we were part Scandihoovian. So I guess we were cigarettes. Go figure.

Do you have a large amount, and many colors of flagging to hang all over the unit in a confusing manner?
You'll need to paint the trees too. Put lots of paint on some, and then really skimp on other trees. Make sure to overspray a lot, that helps confuse things more.

Then hire colorblind fallers. :laugh:
 
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