Craigslist laughs

[stihl362]

Firewood in barrels

Couldnt resist posting this one for you guys. click the link for the pictures of this wood in barrels

FIREWOOD IN BARRELS

FIREWOOD IN BARRELS - $15 (Bergen Co.)


ATTENTION- No emails will be returned. Please call the phone number in the listing.
TJ 201-522-0043

This wood is perfect for filler wood between your bigger logs....
Ideal firewood for wood burning stoves...Gets those coals burning hot!

This is a service that can be offerd year round....
Pick up available
OR
Delivery available for $3 dollars per mile.


Hardwood mixture of cherry, walnut, oak, maple, and poplar.
Firewood is 1" to 4" round logs....
Cut to 8" to 16" lenghts.....

Stacked tightly in barrels....

Green cut firewood (Freshly Cut)... $15 a barrel.
Seasoned firewood........................... $20 a barrel.

TJ 201-522-0043

 

[millbilly]

Couldnt resist posting this one for you guys. click the link for the pictures of this wood in barrels

FIREWOOD IN BARRELS

Believe it or not he will probablly sell them too. lmao

 

[darkbyrd]

Couldnt resist posting this one for you guys. click the link for the pictures of this wood in barrels

FIREWOOD IN BARRELS

Believe it or not he will probablly sell them too. lmao

Not a bad deal if they leave the "barrel"! Half-price trash can, and free kindling!

Shop Rubbermaid 32-Gallon Gray Outdoor Garbage Can at Lowes.com

 

[branchbuzzer]

Delivery available for $3 dollars per mile.

I liked that part the best....is that per barrel?

Those barrels look pretty cheap compared to six $5 bundles too.

 

[Philbert]

Not a bad deal if they leave the "barrel"! Half-price trash can, and free kindling!

The good ones get pulled - you gotta post them.

Philbert

ATTENTION- No emails will be returned. Please call the phone number in the listing.
TJ xxx-xxx-xxxx

This wood is perfect for filler wood between your bigger logs....
Ideal firewood for wood burning stoves...Gets those coals burning hot!

This is a service that can be offerd year round....
Pick up available
OR
Delivery available for $3 dollars per mile.


Hardwood mixture of cherry, walnut, oak, maple, and poplar.
Firewood is 1" to 4" round logs....
Cut to 8" to 16" lenghts.....

Stacked tightly in barrels....

Green cut firewood (Freshly Cut)... $15 a barrel.
Seasoned firewood........................... $20 a barrel.

TJ xxx-xxx-xxxx

 

[Rearden]

Here is an email from my last Craigslist person after I told him that I would be there tomorrow to take down a medium sized red oak in his backyard.

"yes, that's fine. while you're here, if u wouldn't mind cutting down some dogwoods & some off my magnolia & mulberry trees in the back that u can easily reach from the ground, i'd like u to do that, too. u can have any & all of the wood that u cut from those, too.
i also have some limbs hanging over my house from some kinda tree,i need you to climb up there and trim them back.my neighbor wants her litle trees trimmed in her yard next door, i told her that u wood do it for me.or i'll borrow your utility chainsaw & cut it up myself if u can just get it on the ground for me. thanks!
and my freind says that u can grind the stumps down to the ground with your chainsaw,just use a old chain and wash your saw with a garden hose real good to get the dirt out.is that okay?"



I am thinking that maybe this job is going to be a hassle, full of "whileuratits"
Wash my saw?I think not!Loan you my saw?I think not!

Ya see, this is exactly why I no longer carry a gun. There's just no way I could afford ALL of the ammunition required... even savin' my brass and reloadin'...

Wash it with the garden hose??? I don't know if I could even form words to respond to him.

 

[Rearden]

This has been around a while, but it's funny nonetheless if ya haven't seen it before

Supposedly Snopes says this was a real C.L. ad that was pulled after about 4 hours, however the original is also several years old I believe.

Still...


PERSONALS AD

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.

Date: 2011-11-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!

Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi,

Alex

 

[banshee67]

^

gotta be fake

especially when he goes on about how he committed armed robbery, credit card fraud/theft , destruction of property, etc.
sounds like he committed more crimes than the guy trying to rob him.

there are lots of people competing on craigslist to see who can write the most outlandish #### all the time, trying to get on 'best of craigslist'

 

[Rearden]

^

gotta be fake

especially when he goes on about how he committed credit card fraud/theft

there are lots of people competing on craigslist to see who can write the most outlandish #### all the time, trying to get on 'best of craigslist'

Yeaaah I'm sure it is... but it's still fun to think about.

 

[millbilly]

Yeaaah I'm sure it is... but it's still fun to think about.

how many muggers have a credit card let alone one with that had that much credit, to fill 4 cars and a mobil home

 

[zogger]

A couple

Yeaaah I'm sure it is... but it's still fun to think about.

--I've had some "save my bacon" episodes with my second amendment tools. Not anything as interesting as the CL post though, but...just as effective I guess, and never had to actually pop anyone yet. Here's two, I have had several actually....

Once, some doofus tried to carjack me. I had *just* got a new .44 at da store, and it was sitting next to me on the other seat. Stopped at a light, he comes running up, sticks his hands in, grabs the wheel, starts trying to do the door... I grabbed the 44, he saw me reaching for it to blast his azz, he took off running......

Another time, I am getting off early from work downtown, parked in a pay lot. Some street mugger guy, much bigger than me, comes up to me, regular "intimidating" type stance, barks at me "gimme $20"

I said "how about 45 instead"? Started stepping back, swept vest to the side, start pulling it out, he ran, fast.....

 

[banshee67]

zogger - its pretty disheartening to hear you wouldnt give the nice man $20 to feed his family he had waiting at home.
what kind of human are you?

 

[Rearden]

Zogs, get yee to a range where you can work on un-holstering that weapon a little cleaner (strong and weak hand remember). The shot really needs to be in the front, not the azz - otherwise the cops and the D.A.... they start askin' all sorts of stupid questions.

Also grab some Mag Safe SWAT loads and get acquainted with how your weapon handles them. Not your every day target load at 2,260 fps & 771 ft. lbs. of energy in .45 ACP, and a little expensive at almost $3 a piece, but like I said - they aren't something to shoot all day - just enough to get comfortable at first and then... well I can't imagine a situation where ya might need more than one unless there are lots of bad buys. Generally whatever these things hit either dies or that part just isn't there anymore - enters like a roll of quarters and leaves about 12" later at about the size of a basketball. True one stop shot power all of the way down to about a .38. In the multiple bad guy scenario you'll probably have to shoot fast (and ya might have to un-learn that whole double tap thing), so you don't have all of the aforementioned uncomfortable "What happened to their spinal chords?" questions.

Mag Safe Ammo - Pre-Fragmented Saftey Ammunition Handcrafted In The USA

Of course I guess there may be times when you DO wish to merely wound - I just can't think of any right off the top of my head - I dunno, maybe your daughter's date brings her home a few minutes late... or calls ya "Dude". For those situations I suppose these might be a little cheaper.

.45 ACP - Grizzly Xtreme - 175 Gr. +P JHP Ammo Test - YouTube

If you're able to recover the projectiles, the spent bullets also make a dandy Xmas tree ornament!

 

[zogger]

zogger - its pretty disheartening to hear you wouldnt give the nice man $20 to feed his family he had waiting at home.
what kind of human are you?

The kind of guy who tried to get that doofus busted and failed! Right across the street and down the block a little a cop was directing traffic in and out of the parking garage in a big building. I go over, keeping the potential mugger in view, he slowed down and was trying to blend into the crowd, get to the cop, told him what went down, tell him I can ID the guy down the block if he wants to go grab him..he shrugs, mumbles like "well, that's why ya got a carry permit, it works" and went about directing traffic.

 

[Somesawguy]

zogger - its pretty disheartening to hear you wouldnt give the nice man $20 to feed his family he had waiting at home.
what kind of human are you?

He did offer him more than he asked for. I'd say he went the extra mile.

 

[upsnake]

FREE FIRE WOOD

I pity the foo that doesn't go get this wood. Haha

Avoid scams and fraud by dealing locally! Beware any deal involving Western Union, Moneygram, wire transfer, cashier check, money order, shipping, escrow, or any promise of transaction protection/certification/guarantee. More info
FREE FIRE WOOD (toledo)

Date: 2012-01-07, 9:05AM EST
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]

Have large pile of burnable wood. YOU MUST COME PICK IT UP. contact Matt 567-686-3202 can text a picture of wood pile size if need be, its about one pickup bed full.

Location: toledo
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 2787654944

 

[Rearden]

I so much prefer that to being told that I MUST pick up the fire-proof firewood.

It's like ... sometimes you just look at this stuff and wonder - "do they not ever read what they type" or "does this actually sound this dumb in their head and they type it anyway"?

 

[Philbert]

I so much prefer that to being told that I MUST pick up the fire-proof firewood.

In fairness to the CL poster, there are also incredible CL shoppers, and I can imagine some of them contacting him to ask if he will deliver and stack the free wood, also for free. Hence, the "you must come pick it up" emphasis.

I sometimes post stuff on 'FreeCycle' - where you give away stuff that someone might be able to use, or is too good to throw away, but not worth selling. It is amazing what some people ask for or expect. Again, in fairness, they are in the minority, and most of the people offering are generous, and most receiving are grateful, but that small group makes you nuts . . . .

Philbert

 

[branchbuzzer]

In fairness to the CL poster, there are also incredible CL shoppers, and I can imagine some of them contacting him to ask if he will deliver and stack the free wood, also for free. Hence, the "you must come pick it up" emphasis.

but that small group makes you nuts . . . .

Philbert

Yep, and the biggest nuts are the ones checking the Free section.

 

[upsnake]

Hmmm yea now that you mention it, I can see how that may be what the poster meant. I just didn't read it like that. I read it as though, there is wood and I order you to come get it. Hahah