Well,the missus pulled out the TV dinners on me Friday night, and also insisted that I had better sleep with one eye open if I dont want a 2x4 up alongside the head,so off to the doc I went on Saturday morning.They didnt have any openings,but promised to "work me in".
Its amazing what you can find to do in a waiting room with 37 hours of time to kill.I fixed their lamps sitting on the coffee table,one was flickering and the other wobbled.Replaced a couple of burnt out bulbs in an office,fixed a wobbly table for the receptionist,and in general made a nuisance of myself until it was my turn.I had just managed to pull the mirror off of the wall in the mens room when the nurse found me and even though I explained that the crooked thing had ticked me off every time I go in there to pee,she thought it was best that I wait in the doctors examing room.
I had to settle for the magazines there,they locked the tools back up in the closet and even cautioned me that I had better not pull my pocket knife out for any reason except maybe to ward off any evil spirits that always hide in the half naked posters on the wall.Do they really think that puts you at ease, a picture of a some guy with half of his head sawed off to show you his brains?
By the way,Uncle Mustache,you now have 166 reproductions of your 'stache in our local doctors office,complimentary of a budding artist and a real nice ballpoint pen left on the counter.Even the chicks look like you.Never heard of a Viagra pen before, but it sure draws nice.
Well,the doc showed up.I talked and pointed, he listened and scraped with what looked like an Army surplus hunting knife that had last been sharpened in 1602 and finally agree that I had a problem.I sure was glad I hadnt been imagining it.
He gave me a shot in the butt,and a prescription for steroids like some of you mentioned.And what a pill that is.I really thought there had to be a mistake,I ended up having to take 6 pills at a shot that first day, and the dose decreases each day after that.To tell the truth,I really dont like those pills!Cant sleep,edgy as a constipated walaby,and ate more food in the last two days than even Oprah puts away.Our minister on Sunday kept shooting me nervouse looks,I guess the ruckus out in front of church wound him up a bit,but that is another story.But,they seem to be doing the trick,I can now walk around Walmart without leaving a trail or carrying a mop,and thats a good thing I reckon.Although it really was handy for my daughter to find me in that dang store.
Thanks for all your suggestions everyone!