Dear Abby

[Jaberwky]

Dear Abby:
I have one heck of a scrape to get out of. This one is a doozy, and I just can’t decide the right thing to do. I’m sure you will help me out with my problem. I can’t believe it but my wife hasn’t noticed the $900 new saw I bought last month. Not that I’d expect her to actually SEE it in the garage, after all, one creamscicle is the same as any other, right? No, I’m talking about the dreaded credit card bill. Several hundred bucks at a hardware store is sure to raise suspicion, but so far, nothing but silence. So my question is, should I tell her about it and claim that I was just “trying it out” between then and now, or let her figure it out on her own (maybe never?!) and then try to convince her that it is really SAVING us money by allowing me to cut a lot more, way faster?

Signed, Stihl Waiting for the Poop to Hit the Fan

 

[WoodChuck'r]

I wouldn't keep it from my wife, but hey, my wife r00lz.

She's kick @$$ enough that she doesn't really care how many saws I do or don't buy (or anythig else for that matter - it's not just limited to saws). I don't ever try to "sneak one by" though. Some say it's better to ask for forgiveness than for permission - that's generally the case but never should be with the wife.

 

[spanky1205]

Lying by omission is still lying. Fess up and get it over with. That way you can feel better about it while you are using it. Unfortunatly you have set yourself up for the "remember when" comment for the next few fights. Remember when you bought that saw....

 

[Guido Salvage]

In the words of John Prine:

Stihl waiting, Stihl waiting
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood

 

[PA Plumber]

Dear WFTPTHTF,

Your worried that your wife will be upset that you bought a tool to help you work harder and save her money in the long run? I'm sure she will understand that this purchase is for her benefit; actually a purely selfless ambition on your part, to help her be able to buy more shoes.

I am encouraging you to humbly bring up the aforementioned purchase as you are serving her breakfast, or while cleaning up the supper dishes after doing 4 loads of laundry and cleaning all the bathrooms.

Sincerely, The Abster.

 

[JRepairsK70e]

the longer you keep that saw purchase to yourself the more expensive its gonna get ,believe me ,come clean , preserve the trust ,good luck jk

 

[Fish]

These guys must be young..... Lie, Lie, lie.

If you have ever watched a mafia movie, you would know.

deny, deny, deny......

tell her that you are gay, and the charges are for a male prostitute!

That will slow her down a bit........

Deflect, obfuscate, keep her guessing.........

 

[igpoe]

In the words of John Prine:

Stihl waiting, Stihl waiting
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain't what you ain't
So listen up Buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood

..............but I'd rather have names thrown at me, than to fight for a thing that ain't right.

 

[CedarRock]

Offer to buy her a supercharged vacuum cleaner. Tools are tools.:wink2:

 

[spacemule]

She hasn't said anything? Hmm, wonder what she has been up to. Do you think she should have said something? Should you have bought the thing?

 

[avason]

She didn't notice and you're going to tell her? As Homer Simpson would say, "Doh!" Unless it's going to mess things up in the real world and you guys are good, I would say you are in the clear my man!

 

[Stihlman441]

This is how i started,sell some firewood to friends,nieghbers what ever that way you can fend and inlarge your CAD habit.

 

[Ductape]

I wouldn't say anything....... but my wife doesn't have a problem with my saw / tool / tractor habit.


When my wife brings home another pair of shoes...... I don't say a damn thing either.

 

[sunfish]

My wife is OK with everything I buy, probably because I discuss it with her before I buy.

 

[Johndirt82]

What she don't know won't hurt her!
Just like when my darling silverspoon baby opened her christmas card last year " Heres to another year, enjoy those lights , cable tv and hotwater while you sit around watching lifetime manhater vision and do nothing"
love me!

But really its up to you man, if you have a guilty conscience about it get it off yer shoulders.
If not let it go, you pay the bills right?

 

[J.Walker]

If your wife has not said a thing about the new saw I'd say go buy another!

Just don't have WoodChucker over because he'll spill the beans! :msp_tongue:

 

[Guido Salvage]

..............but I'd rather have names thrown at me, than to fight for a thing that ain't right.

This is the more germane verse:

"And she spent all the money I give her"

 

[rupedoggy]

The time has come, the Walrus said to talk of many things.
Of saws you buys by telling lies, and why to tell us Kings,
You have no balls and sneek down halls and through your nose be rings!

 

[Fish]

googoochakoob?

 

[HILLBILLYREDNEC]

Be man and grow a pair. Tell the truth. My fiancee hates me to not teller why I hauled home some more saws or parts, she already knows the landlord refers to me as Jed Clampet A real man tells the his partner the truth,a coward hides things from his partner.