Go ahead and flame me - but advice and advise are not the same word

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I've always had trouble spelling Mississippi, I can always spell the river, but never the state.


Well, I hate to point this out after the guvner they had awhile back but didn't you ever find it odd that there are two Mrs Sippi's but not a single Mr Sippi???

I could fix y'all up on grammar around here. I got a friend has a transcription service in DC. There is a forum where they spend their time debating where to use a comma and where to use a semicolon. She types about three hunnert and fifty-three words a minute or something like that, think she has to use a water cooled keyboard! Heard tell it sounds like a chainsaw on 50-50 methanol/nitro. I could get her over here five minutes a day to catch us all up on grammar.

Thing about grammar, they won't leave it the hell alone. 2+2 was four when I went to grammar school, it is still four now! Danged grammar and spelling that was just fine fifty years ago done got bent all to hell out of shape now! Found an old math book where they were busy cyphering and using oughts and noughts but they got the same answers a hunnert years ago we get now.

No sense learning today's grammar anyway, tomorrow it is gonna be TiTCG or BINGO or some such. The computer is getting smarter, the phone is getting smarter, even my oven and washing machine are getting smarter, we are getting dumber. The machines may indeed take over!

Hu LMAOTTOWICLWN!
 
Loose and lose. Please learn the difference. Please?

That is one that really gets up my nose. Like REALLY gets up my nose. Up to the second knuckle...

Along with "Prostrate Cancer". I always ask "Is that a type of cancer you get when laying down?".

Or, being an Agronomist, Glysophate instead of GLYPHOSATE (the active ingredient in Round Up herbicide).

OK that may only upset me but you get the picture. I class myself as a god spella and my inglish is top notch.
 
Years ago when I worked at a health insurer, we had a sales rep that had an extraordinary ability to butcher the language. He would substitute words, i.e. asparagus for esophagus ("He got something caught in his asparagus").

I started keeping track of them and got up to 3 pages. His name was Carson, they became known as Carsonomas.
 

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