How do you Answer "Can I borrow your Chainsaw?"

[VinceGU05]

can i borrow ya missus?

 

[tla100]

What chainsaw?????

 

[stubnail67]

I just say No.....

 

[president]

I keep a beater saw for those 'Can I borrow your saw' occasions.
Keeps friends friends.

T-1

 

[Woos31]

 

[Westboastfaller]

Can I borrow your wife?
and when they say sure...I say:
Ok bad example, '
"she's not really one of those; 'everyone's girl'

 

[USMC615]

I've got advice to loan and won't cost a penny...go to a rental store. Chainsaw Loaning 101, solved.

 

[BGE541]

I keep a loaner saw on hand or give them an Echo cause if you use the right fuel you cant kill it...

 

[Slingblade]

Whenever someone asks to borrow "my" saw I just smile and and ask em if they heard the one about Patty and Olof, a couple of out-of-work lumberjacks who were wondering around town looking for some action when Patty points to a sign in a saw shop window that says, "Tree fellers wanted, apply within"...
Olof reads the sign, turns to Patty and says, "Dat's no good to us Patty me boy, dere's only da two of us"....

 

[Slingblade]

Can I borrow your wife?
and when they say sure...I say:
Ok bad example, '
"she's not really one of those; 'everyone's girl'

Mornin good looking....I know you'll understand, I just can't like this^^^...

 

[Westboastfaller]

Whenever someone asks to borrow "my" saw I just smile and and ask em if they heard the one about Patty and Olof, a couple of out-of-work lumberjacks who were wondering around town looking for some action when Patty points to a sign in a saw shop window that says, "Tree fellers wanted, apply within"...
Olof reads the sign, turns to Patty and says, "Dat's no good to us Patty me boy, dere's only da two of us"....

Quit baiting us you..

Your Patrick spells his name the feminine way...(not that I'm any expert but I am an export *wink*

Ok.. I guess I have time for a quick one (not really...I fired my helper last night. That's one down. This guy didn't even make it at of Vancouver. Its a great place to skid him but it puts me in a bad place. )

So Paddy & Sean leave Belfast for the big Island to bomb London. So Sean is sitting with the Bomb on his lap on route and looks over at Paddy and says;...." Patrick!
....what if the Bomb goes off on the we there"? ...."Need not worry Sean, we've got another one in the trunk
( 'boot')

 

[Slingblade]

Quit baiting us you..

Your Patrick spells his name the feminine way...(not that I'm any expert but I am an export *wink*

Ok.. I guess I have time for a quick one (not really...I fired my helper last night. That's one down. This guy didn't even make it at of Vancouver. Its a great place to skid him but it puts me in a bad place. )

So Paddy & Sean leave Belfast for the big Island to bomb London. So Sean is sitting with the Bomb on his lap on route and looks over at Paddy and says;...." Patrick!
....what if the Bomb goes off on the we there"? ...."Need not worry Sean, we've got another one in the trunk
( 'boot')

Hahaha, that joke was a boot...(see what I did there)...

Oh and Jamie me boy, I hope you remember that ^^ highlighted in red the next time the grammar police pay you a visit...*winkydinky*...

 

[Westboastfaller]

Mornin good looking....I know you'll understand, I just can't like this^^^...

I don't know why?? It reeks monogamy

It may also suggest I hold my saws in a higher regard..just a little.
Those days are gone but you always have to give a man a couple of hours with his new saw.

That's where my X went wrong one day from my veiw point anyway.

We were doing a small Gypo job in 2002 and camping on our wood.
It was a day off and The other four cutters
Just got back with groceries and picked up my new saw at the bus station. Great news for me it was there. I quickly ripped it open and mounted the bar and chain then the boys were going to pick some wild blackberries and raspberries for after dinner ice cream. Of course the kids got excited and let out a big YEAH! as they were going with this time. The Wife joined the cheer and looked at me and privately said "we get to have sex"

Have you ever been so disappointed and had to act as happy as them at the time?
I'm sure we all have, I was devastated as I wanted to doctor up my chain and tune my saw and such.

To be continued......

Do not miss part 2

 

[1Alpha1]

Come on...how hard could it be to use a chainsaw? You put gas in the gas tank, and used dirty motor oil in the oil tank, and let 'er rip.

Right??

Yup......all you need to do is put straight gas in the fuel tank.........

 

[c5rulz]

I'd loan out the wife. Can't ever get her started anyway.

 

[Westboastfaller]

ROTFLMFAO^^^^

 

[wde_1978]

My dad once loaned his old big Lombardini LA300 powered bar mower to a relative - he had to go get it of the fields with his tractor and trailer soon after (it is nearly impossible to move the mower with the engine not running due to its weight and the gearbox drag).
The engine got over revved and the connection rod blew up (fell apart).
I think he learned his lesson as he never loaned it out ever since!
NOTE: The LA300 engine features auto-throttle, when load increases it will rev higher on itself. The manual throttle is actually just an override of the auto-throttle.

I don't loan anything out no more as I had a fair amount of negative experience myself, varying from having to chase down my property up to never having it gotten back!
Now somebody comes and asks to borrow something form me, I say: You need something, You go buy it just as I did.

I make exceptions in form of "I'll come by and do myself what needs be done with my tools" if I have the time.
I'd also go cut most anybody's firewood if I'll be reimbursed for spent material (fuel, oil).
But, NO - nobody gets any of my saws without me being present, supervising!

 

[Westboastfaller]

Hahaha, that joke was a boot...(see what I did there)...

Oh and Jamie me boy, I hope you remember that ^^ highlighted in red the next time the grammar police pay you a visit...*winkydinky*...

What are you saying...Dyslexics shouldn't throw stones, as they live in glass houses.
That would probably be a good rule to live by, right up there with; don't sit in the front row and heckle a comedian, They do it for a living and have the microphone.

I like to live dangerous
Oh and now I *Recognize* . It has nothing to do with memory
"Quit baiting us, Slingblade"!
*wink*

 

[Analyst Man]

A long, long time ago
I can still remember how that chainsaw used to make me smile
And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make that chainsaw dance
And maybe keep me happy for a while.

But some jackass made me shiver
With every cut log I’d deliver
Bent saw on the doorstep
I couldn’t take one more step

I can’t remember if I cried
When I saw my chainsaw on its side
But something touched me deep inside
The day my chainsaw died.

So bye, bye Mr lend me stuff guy
Ran my chainsaw through some roots n rocks but doesn’t know why
I’m trying to forget it drinking whiskey ‘n rye
Singing don’t lend your stuff it will die
Don’t lend your stuff it will die.

 

[1Alpha1]

I'd loan out the wife. Can't ever get her started anyway.

You're not choking her enough............