What am I doing wrong?

[farmer steve]

What I can tell from the photo. . . it appears your vagina might be getting in the way of your wood splitting. Have you measured the spacing of your eyes and compared them to the rest of humanity. . . lol Just kidding Jethro.
Go toss that wood out by the road with a sign that says: FOR.SALE.campfire wood $100.... Take that $100.and buy some potato chips and beer. Problem solved

 

[Gypo Logger]

What I can tell from the photo. . . it appears your vagina might be getting in the way of your wood splitting. Have you measured the spacing of your eyes and compared them to the rest of humanity. . . lol Just kidding Jethro.
Go toss that wood out by the road with a sign that says: FOR.SALE.campfire wood $100.... Take that $100.and buy some potato chips and beer. Problem solved

Lol. Labia surgery perhaps?

 

[skindaddy]

put that thing down get a sledge and wedge, done in 3minutes,
estwing makes the best wedge ive used bought the last few at homedepot they changed design from my dads old old one ive been using though.

 

[hardpan]

Assuming you are serious. Noodle, rotate, flip, wedge are all good ideas. I can't tell what kind of wood you have and some are quite stubborn. A maul should also be sharp, have a gradual taper near the cutting edge, and the sides that touch the wood should be slick and shiny for the best results. Shaving with a dull rusty blade doesn't work the best either. LOL

 

[CRThomas]

I took a post hole digger and put a splitter screw on it and I think I can split any thing might not. Mr Ford hauled me a 6.6 foot thru log 20 ft long on his 10 wheeler roll back. My biggest chain saw is a 362 with a 20 inch bar I split saw split saw. Done with that one he has 2 more to haul me got one yesterday supose to get the other this after noon I going to let the lay till next week. Had to put my grader box back on and push a load of grave down in a wash out thats life when you live on a hill.

 

[hupte]

I took a post hole digger and put a splitter screw on it and I think I can split any thing might not. Mr Ford hauled me a 6.6 foot thru log 20 ft long on his 10 wheeler roll back. My biggest chain saw is a 362 with a 20 inch bar I split saw split saw. Done with that one he has 2 more to haul me got one yesterday supose to get the other this after noon I going to let the lay till next week. Had to put my grader box back on and push a load of grave down in a wash out thats life when you live on a hill.

apparently this is the liquid lunch thread.
LOL!!!!

 

[066blaster]

Nail a cookie to the top and sell it as a end table.

 

[cantoo]

Flip it 90* and split it. Just like I did with your Mom.
I use hydraulics but I would split with an exe the same way. I did buy 2 axes and a splitting axe last week but haven't even tried them yet. I'm doing ash so it's not that bad.

 

[turnkey4099]

I'd pick up my 10lb sledge and give that maul some good whacks. Hold maul left hand, use right hand on sledge. Others are probably right though, it won't split good starting there.

If a few good whacks didn't get it would be tossed on the 'to noodle'

Harry K

 

[Woody912]

you could fight that chunk all night and most of next week. sure looks like elm to me. even the nice rounds with no branches dont split well. you could try turning 90... or flip it over and take each side in half and then burn the rest. either hydraulic or noodling would be better options. most wood will split fairly easily the way you are trying but elm is a no go.

I concur on elm. I'd only split that chunk on a bet and I would turn it 90

 

[Chris-PA]

Spit on it first.

 

[cantoo]

This is what the grain of that piece will look like once it's split. 2nd pic is how I would split it.

 

[mainewoods]

Give your girlfriend the maul and go have another beer.

 

[square1]

I give those to the neighbor and let him cuss at them

 

[Guswhit]

apparently this is the liquid lunch thread.
LOL!!!!

I'm usually confused after trying to read one of his posts, I was thinking I must have lost some of it in the translation but the liquid lunch is making ALOT of sense now

 

[brenndatomu]

I'm usually confused after trying to read one of his posts, I was thinking I must have lost some of it in the translation but the liquid lunch is making ALOT of sense now

I thought it was just me.
A lil punctuation would go a long way...