Need Some Advice

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Dogsout

Dogsout

Can't Fix Stupid!!
Joined
Apr 30, 2011
Messages
590
Location
Iowa
I will tell you which way I am leaning but first to clarify a couple of points. First and foremost I DO NOT pay for firewood.! I don't care where it comes from if I can't process it myself I will go without. (the people that buy wood this is not a slam at you it is just the way I feel) Second keep in mind SHE contacted me I am not out to fleece her out of anything it was HER idea. Third,
I was told by a friend that knows her fairly well and he said she would likely torch the pile before it could be sold out from under her. (This is second hand but I think it goes to the theory that she means business.) Lastly I believe that I have enough wood on hand for a couple of years but put yourself in my shoes and see if you don't look at it a little different.
Here is what I think I will do. I will show up tomorrow morning and have a paper drawn up with the simple statement that she is giving me the wood with no strings attached and have her sign it. If she is good with that I start loading. I will take someones advice and if anyone shows up while I am in the process of loading (Guessing 3 loads with my pickup) I will leave immediately, not return and chalk it up as a lesson learned. Might not be the best plan but it is what I think is the best coarse of action considering the circumstances.
 
ponyexpress976

ponyexpress976

nipple fritters
Joined
Feb 17, 2008
Messages
1,394
Location
new tripoli, pa
Dogsout...you got the right idea. She's in the house, he isn't. She contacted you. Everything you've heard on the back story is hearsay...good luck proving that! Keep a level head about yourself and you got nothing to worry about. If at a later time, it bothers you having that wood, donate it to a family that is struggling.
 
Bushmans

Bushmans

Smoke Dragon Herder
Joined
Dec 29, 2011
Messages
1,156
Location
Charlotte, Michigan
All things aside if it was me I'd take it and if someone showed up i'd play stupid. Some lady called me to haul away her unwanted wood.
Forget aout her explanation and go with the basics. She wants to get rid of the wood and she called you to take it.
If it went to court over wood then she would have to pay for his share not you.

My folks split up and before the divorce my step mom gave all my dads tools away out of spite. Thousands of dollars worth. The judge made her pay my Dad for all his stuff not the guy who got it. That lucky SOB is running around with my inheritance tools now.
You'll be fine.
 
freemind

freemind

ArboristSite Guru
Joined
Jan 19, 2009
Messages
500
Location
Fremont, Indiana
You worry way too much… and ask way too many questions, sometimes ignorance of the specific details can be a blessing.

The wood is not “half his”… the wood belongs to them jointly and one does not have to ask the other before disposing of joint property (just as your wife doesn’t need your permission to withdrawal money from a joint account). When and if a divorce/settlement ever comes, the judge may (or may not) award him half the wood at that time (but only if one of them still has possession). If neither party has possession at time of divorce/settlement it is a non-issue… the law can never require you to pay for something that was legally given to you.

The truth is, it’s only firewood… it ain’t like it’s his pride-and-joy classic Corvette.
She has possession… so the wood is hers do with as she wishes… and she’s gonna’ give it away no matter if you take it or not.
She has given it to you… so load it up and take possession… that makes it yours.
If the husband or his buddy contacts you (doubtful), be nice but firm, deliberate and direct… look ‘em straight in the eye and tell them the wood is yours, it was given to you, and if they have a problem with that they’ll need to take it up with the person that gave it to you (the wife).
If the two of them (husband and wife) work-it-out and ask for the wood back (doubtful on the first count and double doubtful on the second), just be a nice guy and tell them to come get it (they’ll probably never show-up for it). Unless of course, you’ve already burned it… then tell them you burned it.

The only other advice I’d give you is to not get in a pissin’ contest on her (his) property… if the husband, or his buddy, show up (doubtful) while you’re loading… don’t say a single word, don’t even open your mouth to breath… just look ‘em straight in the eye for a couple of seconds, then walk to your vehicles driver door, climb in and drive away. If after he/they leave, and if the wood is still available… she’ll call ya’ and let ya’ know.

Notice I say, “look ‘em straight in the eye” a couple of times… that’s important, it shows you will not be intimidated and you firmly believe you’re doing nothing wrong (and you’re not doing anything wrong). But, if in your heart you feel you’re doing something wrong… than just forget the whole thing… ‘cause in the end, you have to live with yourself a long time.

Me? I'd be goin' after that wood first chance I had.

HERE is the best post on this subject.

There is NO question of legality. It's mutual property, like a joint bank account. SHE can do whatever she want to with it.

You can either GET it, or someone else will.

Besides, how will her family look at it if you run away from it now? They suggested YOU for the job. They might not do it a second time if you don't follow through.
 
Whitespider
Joined
Nov 17, 2010
Messages
22,818
Location
On the Cedar in Northeast Iowa
Forget the paper and having her sign it... all that does is open you up to scrutiny.
See, if the husband would try something stupid like some sort of BS civil suit against you (and her) some slick lawyer could point at that paper and claim you were, or are, trying to cover-up some sort of intent (in a civil suit you don't have to break the law, you only need to intentionally wrong someone, and it's usually a jury deciding it... not a judge). Why would you want to have some sort of paper trail for a gift? Makes absolutely no sense whatsoever! Raises red flags in anyone's mind! And a slick lawyer would exploit that in a heartbeat! If you just accept the gift graciously, say thank you, and drive away... well there ain't any grounds for civil suit when merely graciously accepting a gift.

You need to think in simple terms... If ya' ain't doing anything wrong, there's no reason to CYA!
And if ya' CYA it looks like you, at the very least, thought you did something wrong = intent to wrong someone!
 
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teatersroad

teatersroad

What's a henway?
Joined
Nov 22, 2009
Messages
2,276
Location
Central Oregon
The man wasn’t asking about the morality of taking the wood, he’s already made his mind up on that… he was asking about the legality of taking the wood.
I quote from the original post…


And to put it simply... there ain't any legal problem of any sort.

Oh.. I get it. He wanted legal advice, not moral advise. Well in that case he definitely came to the right place.
 

camr

ArboristSite Operative
Joined
Dec 20, 2010
Messages
291
Location
Michigan
She is in the home. The wood is hers to do with as she pleases (her property, yadda, yadda, yadda). Load it, haul it, stack it and crack open a beer. Nobody is gonna come after you later on for a lousy hundred bucks worth of wood.
 
zogger

zogger

Tree Freak
Joined
Nov 23, 2010
Messages
16,456
Location
North Georgia
It's winter

That lady ain't thinking straight,.She is living in the house that NEEDS firewood, or it wouldn't be there. She can also stop any BIL from coming over and taking it reselling it. She should get a restraining order against dear hubby before doing anything, then calm down herself and *think* about her situation, not react like a cockroach.

He left HER and is now out of state and abandoned her. Technically, sure, she can give that crap way..and the newspapers are fulla little articles that involved the police, and blood, once people stop thinking rationally and think and *act* emotionally. It's juvenile, but adults drop back to that level all the time, usually with bad results. Sounds like both of them need some growing up.

Talk to her and get this clear to her, she just isn't thinking this through clearly. She needs the heat. Or is she just gonna go run away back to mommas house and trash all they had? More juvenile crap. Ya, you can get real mad at a betrayal, but it isn't worth screwing your own life up over in addition to the screwing you just got, that's just compounding the problem.

IF you want to be further involved that is. Otherwise, leave it alone. She and he will learn a life lesson. I know I certainly wouldn't want to be party to juvenile acting out.

No, I wouldn't take the wood, and I would just calmly advise her to keep the wood to heat with.
 

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