Starting next Monday Physics Laws will not be allowed to have bad hair day, be hung over or other Monday Blues. If Moody Blues is in the air, it will be in song only. Gravity will not be allowed to act sluggishly without proper dampening/ control, in other words: -> it will be expected to be in full force like any other day.
Please, adjust calendars and activities accordingly.
Other topics that were covered:
Where as if you tell someone something is on their left side, they will be allowed a 50/ 50 chance to get it right! If they blow it, they will be directed to use their other left, to allevitate any confusion. This has not been voted into law so far, but some action is expected.
Elsewhere they are finding, that if it is Friday for you, it is generally Friday for everyone else, including the bossman. This is a very peculiar phenomenon, but seems rather persistant.
It is now okay, if you are filling in hours cleaning saws , to check air filter with choke closed to keep crap out of carb, for you are cleaning filter to keep said crap out of carb in the first place(leaving it closed to signify it's service), check chain, bar, drive sprocket etc. if a saw isn't being stored for a while, it is also now okay to fill it for service with both gas and oil
, intead of making that a seperate detail. We have fought to pass these provisions, please make a note of them!
When told to lift something, that will now be towards the sky everytime, lowering will be towards the ground. These things have been cross refrenced before, so we are now adopting these pro-visions until further notice. Please make these actions performed quickly without improper hesitation. We ask that you practice and perfect this particular skill on your own time; and have it polished for werk. If you so self righteously think that this new skill level deserves some kinda raise or p-raise, please see the accountant when she comes back from honeymoon tomorrow. She has married her long time beau Jo Ti Sunn, but is prefixing her maiden name (Aites) too it, Hellen is very understanding. So on this aforementioned subject and your p/raise; get up extra early on the morrow and go to Helen W. Aites-Sunn!
The second can(t)-hook with hickory handle you lose, will unexplicably make logs harder to roll over for a while. We will secretly be keeping another one from you (stored with the sky hook), just to be mean and terrible people.
Also, the Senators have noticed if you had a dull chain on a saw and didn't sharpen or change it; the saw fairy will not come and do it for you at night anymore; for she has died. Funeral annoncements have gone out previously. Anyway, do not hand it to someone trying to seriously get werk done and tell them to bulldoze ahead with said saw and chain; especially your boss, and especially when he is dirtier and sweatier than you that he is paying.
Though take heed, arborits weren't the only ones picked on at last session, the makers of Star Trek will no longer be allowed to film episodes on location as they have always done in the past since Gene Rodenbury created it. Also, each and every face of Mt. Rushmore will not be able to be referred to as a natural rock formation anymore.
Proper
Planning
Prevents
Piss
Poor
Performance
Please, adjust calendars and activities accordingly.
Other topics that were covered:
Where as if you tell someone something is on their left side, they will be allowed a 50/ 50 chance to get it right! If they blow it, they will be directed to use their other left, to allevitate any confusion. This has not been voted into law so far, but some action is expected.
Elsewhere they are finding, that if it is Friday for you, it is generally Friday for everyone else, including the bossman. This is a very peculiar phenomenon, but seems rather persistant.
It is now okay, if you are filling in hours cleaning saws , to check air filter with choke closed to keep crap out of carb, for you are cleaning filter to keep said crap out of carb in the first place(leaving it closed to signify it's service), check chain, bar, drive sprocket etc. if a saw isn't being stored for a while, it is also now okay to fill it for service with both gas and oil
, intead of making that a seperate detail. We have fought to pass these provisions, please make a note of them!When told to lift something, that will now be towards the sky everytime, lowering will be towards the ground. These things have been cross refrenced before, so we are now adopting these pro-visions until further notice. Please make these actions performed quickly without improper hesitation. We ask that you practice and perfect this particular skill on your own time; and have it polished for werk. If you so self righteously think that this new skill level deserves some kinda raise or p-raise, please see the accountant when she comes back from honeymoon tomorrow. She has married her long time beau Jo Ti Sunn, but is prefixing her maiden name (Aites) too it, Hellen is very understanding. So on this aforementioned subject and your p/raise; get up extra early on the morrow and go to Helen W. Aites-Sunn!
The second can(t)-hook with hickory handle you lose, will unexplicably make logs harder to roll over for a while. We will secretly be keeping another one from you (stored with the sky hook), just to be mean and terrible people.
Also, the Senators have noticed if you had a dull chain on a saw and didn't sharpen or change it; the saw fairy will not come and do it for you at night anymore; for she has died. Funeral annoncements have gone out previously. Anyway, do not hand it to someone trying to seriously get werk done and tell them to bulldoze ahead with said saw and chain; especially your boss, and especially when he is dirtier and sweatier than you that he is paying.
Though take heed, arborits weren't the only ones picked on at last session, the makers of Star Trek will no longer be allowed to film episodes on location as they have always done in the past since Gene Rodenbury created it. Also, each and every face of Mt. Rushmore will not be able to be referred to as a natural rock formation anymore.
Proper
Planning
Prevents
Piss
Poor
Performance
Almost an hour up in the full sun, and only 3 pines topped out. 
