Neighbors that borrow stuff.

[Fred Wright]

We don't have neighbors either... not close by anyhow. That suits us both just fine.

The SheWolf's son recently finished the metal roof on our home. We bought the materials, he came down from Western PA to install it. We're getting too old to help much but we did what we could for him while he was here. A nice guest room to stay in, home cooked meals etc. And paid him for his time. I offered to pay union rate but he wouldn't take it. He's a roofer by trade and did a top notch job.

Reason I'm posting this, I wasn't about to ask for free (or discount) labor, especially after what I went through when I was married. Nobody should be expected to work for free. No matter who we're working for or when, time is inventory and we all gotta eat.

Back in the married years I ran a mobile DJ business. Her sister's son-in-law expected me to DJ at their home on their boy's birthday every year. At no charge, of course. One year they almost caused me to be late to a night campground show, a bunch of people had blocked my truck in the drive.

Anyhow, one year my truck needed a clutch. The SIL, who worked in a tranny shop offered to do the job for me at their home. I figured what the heck, maybe I'll get something in exchange for years of DJing free for those asshats.

He did the clutch job... and told me I owed him $175.00 for the work. To say I was ticked off would be putting it mildly. I paid him, just to keep the peace.

The following summer they called, wanting me to DJ the kid's party again. I said sure... discount rate of $175.00 and a signed contract.

Yup... crickets chirping. They never called me again.

 

[whatscooking]

Had one of those moments today. The weather will break around here for a day they said, seventy with splotches of sun. Went with the wife for a walk on our county road this morning early. Walking for me most times helps clear the mind puts things back in perspective. Walking along I got to thinking I could go over there and move that thing he wanted real quick and be done with it. Then I got to thinking about some of the post I have read and how this kind of crap cuts into time spent where YOU want to spend it. So I said to myself, nice day going here with good company the roads are clear you got a motorcycle aimed out the door ready to go and that restaurant we like has the best breakfast. Didn't take us long to think that one through. I think the bike ran better than it ever has and the breakfast measured up also.

 

[whatscooking]

And when we got home I got my tools together and grabbed the little Stihl I just saved from a pile that I got running sweet and got a nice load of wood put up. Think I like these feelings better.

 

[computeruser]

I finally had that moment of clarity this year: I need to focus on my own crap and not everybody else's. It is really liberating!

I have a couple absent neighbors, and I look after their houses. Small projects invariably pop up when they're away. Lawns need to be cut, the snow shoveled. I finally figured out what this was costing me versus what they were paying me - a whole nasty winter of snow removal and salting definitely was worth more than $200 of my time and salt, for example - and decided to formally resign from these tasks. They weren't pleased, but they were able to deal with it so far. And I have some of my free time back now, and even started working on projects in my own house for a change.

Appreciation and thanks is nice, and the occasional payment for work done is nice. But the real commodity in life that is scarce is time. Once that's gone, it's gone. I finally realized that this year, and I am glad I did.

 

[laynes69]

Over the years, I've learned to say no. Unfortunately, it's like feeding a stray cat, do it once and it comes back along with it's friends. Some people think I'm an a..hole, but I don't mind. I help those who I want to help, those who don't take advantage of me. I can't stand moochers. I've worked too hard to give things away.

 

[Odog]

I bought the house I grew up in and one of my neighbors still lived next door. I remember him being old when I was a kid so I have no idea how old he is now. He watches over the house for me when I'm out of town and I shovel his sidewalk and mow his lawn. We never ask each other to and I never ask for payment, it's just something We feel like doing. He is a good old guy who lives by himself. We kinda take care of each other, he always stops at the store and buys my girls a snickers once a week. Good neighbors are hard to find

 

[olyman]

I finally had that moment of clarity this year: I need to focus on my own crap and not everybody else's. It is really liberating!

I have a couple absent neighbors, and I look after their houses. Small projects invariably pop up when they're away. Lawns need to be cut, the snow shoveled. I finally figured out what this was costing me versus what they were paying me - a whole nasty winter of snow removal and salting definitely was worth more than $200 of my time and salt, for example - and decided to formally resign from these tasks. They weren't pleased, but they were able to deal with it so far. And I have some of my free time back now, and even started working on projects in my own house for a change.

Appreciation and thanks is nice, and the occasional payment for work done is nice. But the real commodity in life that is scarce is time. Once that's gone, it's gone. I finally realized that this year, and I am glad I did.

 

[shootingarts]

Just a chuckle about old people. Mr and Mrs J were in their mid to late eighties when this happened. A tree fell on their place so Mr J cut and split the wood then gave it to his neighbor. Mrs J was hot! She said that neighbor kid was just in his sixties, if he wanted the wood he should have came cut and split it himself! Great people. I'm not sure if they are still alive but they might outlive all of us.

Back to the thread: Absolutely nothing wrong with helping people occasionally, especially when it is a two way street. The moochers are the ones that sour the well for everybody.

Hu

 

[lknchoppers]

I help a little too much but know when to say "No" now. I try to find someone local that needs firewood to heat their home and give a load of firewood to them. I maintain three households including my own, electrical, plumbing, leaf blowing, gutter cleaning, lawn mowing, work my regular job and about 35 hrs a week at my firewood business. When somebody needs something extra fixed I usually tell them 2- 3 weeks I should have a couple hours free which is the truth., so I really don't have to say no. As far as borrowing goes a breaker bar or a "C" clamp but anything with a motor or I need to make money, everybody knows to not even ask. I don't borrow so they shouldn't expect it.

 

[iceman7668]

Too many times kindness is taken as weakness, and people try to exploit it. The more I am around people, the more I enjoy my dogs.

 

[square1]

Mrs J was hot!

When you say she was hot...
Me and Mrs. Jones hot?

 

[Rockarosa]

Too many times kindness is taken as weakness, and people try to exploit it. The more I am around people, the more I enjoy my dogs.

It's sad, but too many times your friendship is used as a weakness against you. When you realize that you've been used it kind of hurts. As they say- No good deed goes unpunished. Took me 62 years to realize this.

 

[steved]

I don't have a problem around here, I'm sure all my neighbors hate me...so they stay far away.

Saying no is difficult at times, especially when you like helping. But always remember, you have to come first in line.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G730A using Tapatalk

 

[timberjak]

I am slowly getting better.

I flat out refuse to borrow out anything with a motor. Gas or electric

All of my trailers are gooseneck or pintle hitch. That stops the trailer borrowing

I use odd couplers on all my attachments for skidsteer. I even had guys say well that one only works on yours, not mine. Oh darn

Recently a guy asked to borrow a bucket with grapple on it for a paying job. I said sure but it needs a hydro hose first. You can use it if u replace it. Nope that did not happen either.

My neighbor next door who has a resort next to mine got free dock help 4 different times before i realized it was only a one way street. Saved him hours. He even said he would help me. He walked out on his dock watched me for awhile and walked off. He kept asking i said i would be over after mine was in. No help no show from me. I wonder how long he waited for me.


Timberjak

 

[Philbert]

Been watching this thread for a while. Takes all types.

Difference between loaning tools and helping. I loan tools to certain guys/neighbors that I know will take care of things, and will loan me things if I ask. I don't ask for really special stuff, and I don't loan chainsaws. Even the electrics. Happy to come out and help with them, if it is within my capabilites.

A couple of the neighbors and I will 'run the block' with our snowthrowers - whoever gets out first. Other guys follow later to clean later snow off the main sidewalk. After a good storm, I look up and down the street to see if there are any trees to clean up - usually get the wood if I have room, so I guess that falls under the 'scrounging thread'.

Philbert

 

[spike60]

There's an inner circle of friends and neighbors. Helping goes 2 ways and nobody has to ask for anything. We just do it. Outside of that I've learned not to get involved in other folks projects.

Will not lend stuff out to anyone. If you guys could only imagine how many pieces of equipment come into the shop and the conversation begins with "somebody borrowed this".............

 

[MechanicMatt]

The circle of trust ehh Bob? Yeah I have a circle, I get the whole circle together once a year for some quality drinking relaxing. You'd be surprised how hard it is to get five other guys all out on the same night when they all have wives to answer to, except for my pops, he's the only single one.......probably the smartest of us too. And yeah I know it sounds corny but pops is in the circle, first guy id want in a fox hole next to me.

 

[shootingarts]

When you say she was hot...
Me and Mrs. Jones hot?

She might just have been Mrs Jones hot in her younger days, when this happened she was just spun up like a chainsaw on straight gas and nitro. Come to think of it, maybe she figured Mr J needed to save his strength and vigor for other things!

Hu

 

[Butch(OH)]

I plan on coming out on the short end of any borrowing or sharing deals with family friends and neighbors,, that way I am never disappointed.

 

[Stihlcuttingwood]

some people practice the golden rule DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU other people practice the olden rule DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO IT TO YOU