Rearden, if we could go back in time, I'd buy you HD video camera just for this one event. Thanks for sharing!
No kidding, I have recently installed a 16 camera hi-rez security cam system that can send me streaming video on my cell. This was actually perpetuated by us discovering that - aside from being a Born Again idiot of the first magnitude, Jesus apparently also told him to try peeping my wife when I'm not home (she's a lot younger than me and quite hot...hell I'd peep her).
Creepy and dumb. So now the hot tub sits unused 'cuz she and my youngest daughter are too creeped out to even think about wearing anything but overalls outside. Of the 16 cameras, half cover all of the approaches to our property from his, so whether I catch him in the act or not, I'm probably good for at least one "America's Funniest Home Video" a year.
We also installed two motion activated sprinklers along the fence line. Wifee wants them to spray acid or dyed cat piss, and my daughter wants to electrify the fence, dig a few tiger pits and set some dead falls. Problem is, they don't wanna help dig the grave...so unless I renew my crabbin' license (I prefer the crab pot method of evidence disposal) there's always that hassle of what to do with the mangled corpse. I did take the time to share with him a few targets from our last trip to the range. Wife with her .40 cal Glock at 50' has no trouble point shooting all in a pie plate. Little girl ain't no slouch with her 9mm either.
The family that shoots together sleeps better we always say.
I wondered where our old neighbor moved to.
Hide your Chickens.
Stay safe!
Dingeryote
I'm actually building a coop and hadn't decided whether or not to subject my neighbors to a rooster. Think I might get several.
You real sure this guy ain't a retired professor of construction technology who taught for years at the War College in Caryle? He has to have multiple degrees and certificates hanging on his wall.
Not quite, but almost as good. He actually used to service the big overhead electric hoists that they used in the steel mills down at the now defunct and bankrupted Beth Steel Sparrows Point works. I'm sure their demise was purely coincidental. Last I heard he was actually designing or consulting on factory automated material handling equipment.
I'm sure OSHA and the Injured Workers Insurance Fund will be very busy this year.
Sounds like this dolt beside me. Ive watched this guy go through saws, 2 riding lawnmowers and at least a half dozen blowers since he moved out here from the city. He asked me one day to take a look at one after his wife straight gassed it, and I just say I think theyre still under warranty arent they? I guess he buys the extended warranties from Sears because I see the box truck coming by to pick up the junk. Im not kidding, he had a new rider once a month this last summer...
This is great...just before his old lady split, she straight gassed his remaining chain saw. God I love her!
Then Beavis goes knockin' on doors lookin' for somebody to lend him a saw?!
Needless to say...he's thankfully the only real idiot in our village, so he found no takers.
The mower comment does remind me of another of his epic fails in slow motion.
He had gotten a great deal on a brand new John Deere lawn tractor at auction, a great huge thing with a monster mower deck and something like a 24 hp engine (he actually only has about a half acre of weedy grass and moss to cut), ROPS bar and a cute little bimini top. Anyway, he brings his new pride and joy home in the bed of the infamous truck that will not die, and then realizes that he has no ramps to unleash it from the bed. I have several very nice sets, but it never occurred to me to offer them up for some reason.
So he finds a pair of knotty 2"x6"'s of questionable grain, but with one particularly large and through knot right in the middle of one board. He actually asked me if I thought it would be OK, and I told him absolutely not - pretty much guaranteeing that he would use it anyway...which he did. Best part was that to try and redude the angle of the incline he was facing, he backed up to a short retaining wall where he had a concrete bumper set underneath to keep him from backing into it with his car. While the lessened incline DID in fact make the travel less frightening looking from the driver's seat I'm sure, it also near doubled the loading on the defective lumber and end up elevating the entire monster mower about three feet off of the ground. I guess they don't think to drop test these things for stupid proofing?
Predictably, retard in charge got half way across before the one board snapped - suddenly dumping him off to the side (he really does have nine lives). The mower wasn't quite so lucky. Somehow it manged to land sideways and bounce, ending up with the deck twisted, the whole side of the machine smashed up and bent one of the deck shafts along with two of the blades. So help me, he actually had the mower deck engaged when this happened. Rumor has it he spent many,many hundreds fixing it before selling it to some poor unsuspecting soul.
where did darwinism go ???how are all these idiots managing to stay alive?? idiocracy is real ...... duck...whew..that was a close one jk
Actually this guy is more like "which one goes in my mouth and which one goes in my...?", oh never mind, I guess it doesn't really matter
LMAO... too funny. Can't blame the big box though, as much as I hate them. Just be glad he didn't ruin a "good" saw.
