Avalancher...I do think we could be kin (I'm actually from western Va). Your description of the wood truck is dead on. The passenger seat of mine has so much dog hair on it that you can't vacuum, brush, or peel it off. My truck also has "that smell", and a week old bologana sandwich really gives it a zing. Here's the test....How many loose shotgun shells do you have rolling around in the cab of your truck..? If you answer more than a dozen we are kin fo sho'...
Well, after reading your post, it really got me to thinking.I really have no idea what is floating around in the truck, so I decided to take a look.
Now at least appearing to be a guy with some sense, I donned my lucky pants.Cant be to careful.I would have employed the wife to do the dictating of the list, but she is rather adament about staying away from the truck when its hot out.The last time she stuck her head in there she received a free but unwanted perm.Little Ceasers pizza boxes dont set too well over a three months time.
Lets see, we have several knives, two without handles.The other without a blade.Might have to do a little part swapping there just in case I want to do the Grizzly Adams thing again next week.
Several Mt.Dew bottles, half drank.Here again, might have to do a little swapping around.filter the spit out of em, and they might just do fine for the next time I have to wash some tylenol down.
The tear in the backseat is getting worse, providing some additional storage space that I desperatly need.I got to close with the pressure washer wand the last time I washed the truck out, and it tore a nice sized hole in the seat.Actually a great place to stash files.
Great assortment of nuts,bolts,screws.Looks like a few Lowes bags blew up in the backseat.Maybe the pizza fumes got to em.....
Big lump of something on the floor boards,looks kinda like Yaks vomit.dont recall giving a ride to a yak, but some of them hitchhikers were kinda close.
Ever give a ride to a hitchhiker?I dont make a habit of it,but an old guy sure looked tired.Evidently he had no idea what the phrase meant,"hang on, its going to get a little rough here" accounting for the sizeable dents in the roof.
The finger grooves on the dash from the last time I gave a ride to my aging mother should have been a giveaway.Remind you to tell you that story sometime when you are bored.
Some loose 16 gauge shotgun shells.Dont remember even owning a 16 gauge.
I make a practise of allowing paper cups to stay in the cupholders.They eventually leak coke into the holders, and provides a great adhesion to future coffee cups.I tried that on the drivers seat as well, the lack of dents on the drivers side roof attests to how great it works.The downhill side it makes getting back out of the truck a real chore, unless you are wearing really old levis who often leave the pants seat behind.This also works to your advantage on the local gas station.Go on in without a seat in your pants, and often the clerk will forget to charge you for some of your stuff.Last time I got a big bag of Funnyunions for free.
A nice collection of gnats,frozen in time and coke glue.
Toolkit.For prying the coffee cups out of the holders.
An acient box of mini wheats never opened.Funny thing is, the expiration date is before this truck was ever built.Weird!
First Aid kit.If you want to visit the woodfairies, I can hook you up.
Golf ball.I dont play golf.
Staple gun.Used primarily to threaten hitchhikers that fell asleep.Or died.Then I just stop and staple em up to the closest telephone pole.
An old Am radio.Just in case my day isnt going bad enough, I tune in Rush Limbaugh while taking a lunch break.
A set of dentures.From the hitchhiker that didnt hold on.
Other than that, nothing weird in my truck.Just the usual spiderman lunch box(hey, it brought me good luck in school, I hate to meddle with good luck.Besides, it looks rather dashing sitting on the tailgate awaiting lunch time)a few old playmate coolers, bar covers that I never remember to put back on the saws,spark plugs,etc.
I reckon my truck isnt any different than anyone else's.
Steve
!
I darn near peed in my pants when I read this. The wife came in wondering what I thought was so funny, She just dosn't see the humor in cutting wood and wood fairies.
