What's the best BS sales pitch you ever got from a dealer?
- Thread starter Trigger Man
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howellhandmade
Addicted to ArboristSite
BigBore All I can say is:jawdrop: What Flip'in idiot told you that one! I'd of said o.k. let me see you do it!:censored:
I was in a gun shop a few years back gabbing with the owner, this guy walks in slaps his 20 guage pump on the counter, says you got a barrel to fit this thing, The owner looks it over, The end looked like an egg beater, Me and the owner looked at each other? Guy goes My buddy got some mud in the end of the barrel and could'nt get it out, so he loader her up and pulled the trigger!I go yup that will do it , good way to kill yourself! He never said a word I never thought someone could be that stupid or careless.:censored:
Heh, heh, heh. It's always the stupid buddy, isn't it? My buddy blew the barrel out of my shotgun, my buddy straight gassed my saw.
Jack
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Trigger Man
Addicted to ArboristSite
I feel sorry for some individuals, who automatically think the shop they are dealing with has it covered as far as knowledge of the products they are selling and or servicing.
Trigger Man
Addicted to ArboristSite
Heh, heh, heh. It's always the stupid buddy, isn't it? My buddy blew the barrel out of my shotgun, my buddy straight gassed my saw.
Jac
Yep, People just can't admit to doing things wrong.
BIGBORE577
Addicted to ArboristSite
Me also. However, I've seen many F'd over by the dumb-ass and learned. Unfortunately, many have not had the same opportunity and for what ever reason, failed.
isaaccarlson
Addicted to ArboristSite
I taked to a Stihl dealer a while back and the subject of porting came up
He said We port saws here, but you have to richen them up so they still turn factory rpm.....Did not know what he was talking about.....He had a buddy there and I had just bought a new rim and they were bashing stihls and BSing and saying how loud the BIG saws were and how they knew a guy who could use an 880 one handed....so I asked if I could start my saw and make sure the rim worked ok, blah blah.....he said OK. (we were in his cement shop) I started it up and gave it heck.....walked out of there with their ears ringing and their jaws on the floor. Have not been back since.
He said We port saws here, but you have to richen them up so they still turn factory rpm.....Did not know what he was talking about.....He had a buddy there and I had just bought a new rim and they were bashing stihls and BSing and saying how loud the BIG saws were and how they knew a guy who could use an 880 one handed....so I asked if I could start my saw and make sure the rim worked ok, blah blah.....he said OK. (we were in his cement shop) I started it up and gave it heck.....walked out of there with their ears ringing and their jaws on the floor. Have not been back since.
dingeryote
Blueberry Baron
Stopped into a nearby John Deere dealer to pick up a replacement wedge for the Stihl auger. While eyeballing some of the cute green stuff they had, a sales dude wearing lime green polyester slacks and white patent leather shoes walked up and started yakking about how great the new lawnmower/tractorette was.
I tried to tell the guy I didn't need a tractor as I already had a couple, but he kept at it. So I asked him if the little Tractorette would handle a 72" brush chopper, or a JDV side harvester(40hp Min). Without blinking he stated the lawnmower would do everything I needed.:jawdrop:
I replied that most 6' Choppers weigh more than his toys, and that new JD Mower is amazing...
The same shop on the saw side of things has a "Manager" who tried to explain to me how the MS361 was a strato saw, because the "1" means strato, and replaced the "0" in 360.
Best one ever.
I was looking for a truck. a 3/4 ton Farm truck.
No frills,Std Cab, long bed, rubber floor, bench seat,AM/FM, crank windows, overbuilt driveline and low gears. No girly crap.
I informed the Salesman when he came slithering out of the building.
He looked at me and shook his head, and smiled.
So the Terd monger walks over to a 4dr, short box, leather interior, two tone, rolling collection of electronics and prom dress fabrics, and says....
"Here's your truck!"
Seriously..my wife grabed me and started dragging me back to the Jeep.
She knew I was about to pull the pin on a logic grenade.
Stay safe!
Dingeryote
I tried to tell the guy I didn't need a tractor as I already had a couple, but he kept at it. So I asked him if the little Tractorette would handle a 72" brush chopper, or a JDV side harvester(40hp Min). Without blinking he stated the lawnmower would do everything I needed.:jawdrop:
I replied that most 6' Choppers weigh more than his toys, and that new JD Mower is amazing...
The same shop on the saw side of things has a "Manager" who tried to explain to me how the MS361 was a strato saw, because the "1" means strato, and replaced the "0" in 360.
Best one ever.
I was looking for a truck. a 3/4 ton Farm truck.
No frills,Std Cab, long bed, rubber floor, bench seat,AM/FM, crank windows, overbuilt driveline and low gears. No girly crap.
I informed the Salesman when he came slithering out of the building.
He looked at me and shook his head, and smiled.
So the Terd monger walks over to a 4dr, short box, leather interior, two tone, rolling collection of electronics and prom dress fabrics, and says....
"Here's your truck!"
Seriously..my wife grabed me and started dragging me back to the Jeep.
She knew I was about to pull the pin on a logic grenade.
Stay safe!
Dingeryote
wigglesworth
Booned
Im still trying to figure out just how many "little old lady school teachers" there are in this world that trade there cars in daily. I have heard that one a bunch. It's equally amazing how these so called "little old lady school teachers" put 100k on a 2 year old car.
Two bits of prime BS, I think I've posted them before...
1) Buying a chain. I walked into a dealer near where I was cutting some friends trees - it was a pretty suburban dealer, so I'd guess an MS170 was a typical buy. I asked for a chain for an 046 with a 25" bar. The bloke looked at me and said I must be mistaken, there was no way I would have such a thing. No really I said, 3/8 chain, 25" bar, can't remember the number of drive links, but it will be on the chart behind you. No way he said. So I invited him out to the Landrover, which was fully loaded with some massive rounds. I opened the back door and pulled the 880 out, and said to him "hold this for a minute, I'd use the chain from this, but it is .404 rather than 3/8. His face was a picture - I don't think he'd ever seen an 880. I rummaged further in the truck and pulled out the 046: see, 3/8, 25" bar. I got my chain.....
2) The hedgecutter. My mother had an old hedge cutter that was a pig to start - a quick inspection revealed a perfect piston, good spark, and a lack of fuel pump. Time for a carb kit. I didn't have time, so I suggested she drop it into the dealer and get it fixed, it wouldn't cost much. So she phoned me that evening. The dealer had told her that it was 10 years old, and the carb could not be fixed, she might as well get a new one. Arrgh. The next time I was down, I took the cutter in, got the chimp behind the counter to read "WALBRO" off the carb, and helped him select a suitable kit. 30 minutes later, a perfect cutter. That dealer was an idiot, as he used to be my default shop. Now I get everything on-line from a very co-operative dealer elsewhere....
1) Buying a chain. I walked into a dealer near where I was cutting some friends trees - it was a pretty suburban dealer, so I'd guess an MS170 was a typical buy. I asked for a chain for an 046 with a 25" bar. The bloke looked at me and said I must be mistaken, there was no way I would have such a thing. No really I said, 3/8 chain, 25" bar, can't remember the number of drive links, but it will be on the chart behind you. No way he said. So I invited him out to the Landrover, which was fully loaded with some massive rounds. I opened the back door and pulled the 880 out, and said to him "hold this for a minute, I'd use the chain from this, but it is .404 rather than 3/8. His face was a picture - I don't think he'd ever seen an 880. I rummaged further in the truck and pulled out the 046: see, 3/8, 25" bar. I got my chain.....
2) The hedgecutter. My mother had an old hedge cutter that was a pig to start - a quick inspection revealed a perfect piston, good spark, and a lack of fuel pump. Time for a carb kit. I didn't have time, so I suggested she drop it into the dealer and get it fixed, it wouldn't cost much. So she phoned me that evening. The dealer had told her that it was 10 years old, and the carb could not be fixed, she might as well get a new one. Arrgh. The next time I was down, I took the cutter in, got the chimp behind the counter to read "WALBRO" off the carb, and helped him select a suitable kit. 30 minutes later, a perfect cutter. That dealer was an idiot, as he used to be my default shop. Now I get everything on-line from a very co-operative dealer elsewhere....
stihlhead
ArboristSite Operative
I sent my wife to the local Stihl dealer to get new clutch springs for my 066. I gave her all three springs and told her I need three more like these but new. She came back about twenty minutes later with my old springs. The dealer told her after looking at them "There isn't anything wrong with these springs!"
I couldn't believe someone could test the integrity of a cutch spring by looking at them!
I couldn't believe someone could test the integrity of a cutch spring by looking at them!
indiansprings
Firewood Purveyor
That a 250 would just cut circles around a 028, no comparision, sad part is that I actually bought a 250, after all the hype, the most disappointing saw I've ever owned, got rid of it in less than a month. The majority of dealers never run saws other than cutting cookies out behind the shop.
BloodOnTheIce
Addicted to ArboristSite
The rep for Bad Boy mowers came last year and had a trailer with 3 big commercial Zerot turns in it. He showed me the mowers and gave me his best sales rap about how well they sell and how much margins you make, laid it on real thick.
Neat mower I tell him, "I ask how many dealers you signed up so far?"
He says I've signed up 3 dealers today.
Really? who'd you sign up?
"Oh well I signed up C&B and Wehner Mower and Brodner."
(C&B is 4 miles away, and talk to them about 2 times a week.)
Really C&B? They're only 4 miles away why are trying to sign me up too?
So I walk inside grab the phone and call C&B and ask Bill the owner if he signed up, right in front of the rep.
Bill laughs and says "Hell No!, I've got Ferris what do I need that Hillbilly junk for?"
I tell the rep he's full of sh*t, and he better take his mowers and get moving along.
The rep puts his tail between his legs turns around closes the trailer up and leaves without saying another word.
If you're gonna lie atleast be clever enough to lie about a dealer, who's not so damn close I can call him.
Neat mower I tell him, "I ask how many dealers you signed up so far?"
He says I've signed up 3 dealers today.
Really? who'd you sign up?
"Oh well I signed up C&B and Wehner Mower and Brodner."
(C&B is 4 miles away, and talk to them about 2 times a week.)
Really C&B? They're only 4 miles away why are trying to sign me up too?
So I walk inside grab the phone and call C&B and ask Bill the owner if he signed up, right in front of the rep.
Bill laughs and says "Hell No!, I've got Ferris what do I need that Hillbilly junk for?"
I tell the rep he's full of sh*t, and he better take his mowers and get moving along.
The rep puts his tail between his legs turns around closes the trailer up and leaves without saying another word.
If you're gonna lie atleast be clever enough to lie about a dealer, who's not so damn close I can call him.
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Good job! Probably saved a life or at the least an injury! Not to mention the owners gun.
I would have repped ya but I'm out of ammo.
Sorry for getting off topic.
Got him!
local rental place tried to overcharge me 1000 on my splitter.
when i told him that was high he said, well it takes a 8 hour day to put one together and plus we "beef up" the weak spots
so i bought it online 1k cheaper and from start to finish it took 2 people 1.5hrs to put it together. talk about mark up, i have half the mind to drive it over there and tell him to fire the guy puttin them together i can do 4 to his one
this is exactly why i do most of my shopping online, no bs. now i will support my stihl dealer as he doesnt try to bs anyone
when i told him that was high he said, well it takes a 8 hour day to put one together and plus we "beef up" the weak spots
so i bought it online 1k cheaper and from start to finish it took 2 people 1.5hrs to put it together. talk about mark up, i have half the mind to drive it over there and tell him to fire the guy puttin them together i can do 4 to his one
this is exactly why i do most of my shopping online, no bs. now i will support my stihl dealer as he doesnt try to bs anyone
I walk into the stihl dealer at Hominy Ok. Ask if i can swap in a chain. Sry sir we dont do that here. Ok i saw can you spin me a new loop? No sir we cant. We have to order them. Im thinking what kind of dealer are you? needless to say i was so mad i just left.
woodenbiker
ArboristSite Operative
You should have told him that if the seats on thier WORK trucks wear so easily that you wanted a discout on your new truck. (Assuming it was the same make?)
highpointtree
ArboristSite Operative
bought my 04 t300 kw to the dealer with 11,000 miles on her and told the dealer there was a clunk noise coming from the front spring rear shackle and I think it needs shims, cause its sliding back and forth when I turn the wheel. well after yanking my steering wheel back and forth and driving it forward and reverse 25 feet at a clip slamming the brakes on trying to diagnose what I already told him was wrong with the truck. He comes up and tells me that there's a problem in the sprin shackle and say's "I don't know if it can be fixed". and tried to bill me an hour for diagnosing what I already told him was wrong with the truck. I told him that it could be fixed for sure even if they had to replace the whole front end!! Didn't give him a dime and took it to a spring place who fixed it for $4.00 worth of part's (shims) and $190.00 labor.
its a lot like saying you can't get there from here....
its a lot like saying you can't get there from here....
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teatersroad
What's a henway?
..this is Toledo Windowbox. - G. Carlin
barton174
ArboristSite Guru
Well, I was in the saw shop when a guy ran in and yelled "THIS IS A ROBBERY!"... He took everybody's wallets, rang up the saw I was looking at and a pack of gum, opened up my wallet, did a ninjitsfu-flip-kick over the counter, and swiped my credit card for the saw and the gum... He left the saw, but took the chewing gum... I tried to return the saw after he left, but since I failed to be in possession of the chewing gum that was also on the reciept, I was unable to return the saw...
...And that, honey, is how I ended up with this new saw...
No, I haven't used it yet, but you can't come up with this stuff when she's chasing after you with a baseball bat, or it won't make any sense... you've got to have it worked out before hand...
Mike
...And that, honey, is how I ended up with this new saw...
No, I haven't used it yet, but you can't come up with this stuff when she's chasing after you with a baseball bat, or it won't make any sense... you've got to have it worked out before hand...
Mike
highpointtree
ArboristSite Operative
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